There comes a point in every man’s life when the stuff he owns is actually desirable to others, and precautions need to be taken to protect such possessions. You probably started by keeping important documents in safe deposit box, but eventually your material items are cool enough to demand display space. What’s the point of owning a Van Gogh if your friends are not able to admire it. Or, if you are Floyd Mayweather, Jr., what’s the point of being super-wealthy if you can’t leave stacks of money in the fridge? You need to keep tabs on what is happening at your pad and also work to keep undesirables (no, not your in-laws) away. We have some nifty of doing just that.

Sealing up the house

If you want to feel safe at night, you need to make sure your home’s simplest access points are sealed tight. Start with the windows. A number of companies offer window security options. Security Shield windows are ridiculously manly. Depending on the security level you choose, the windows are constructed of stainless steel and not only ward off intruders, but also offer protections from bomb blasts and unwanted electronic waves which can be used to eaves drop. From the inside looking out, the window appears like any other, but from the neighbors driveway, it is tinted. No more peeping toms.

The other obvious entrance is your door. Remind your wife that stainless steel is in, and opt for a stainless security door. Not only do you feel protected, but you will have a great conversation piece for the guys at your next dinner party. Mention stainless steel and watch them turn green. Further lock down your doors with a, well, lock. Opt for a futuristic bio-metric device that can only be opened with an approved finger print. Check out the L113-series biometric lock to have total control over who comes and goes. This lock can be programmed to be open at times of your choosing, as well as closed. Also, you can grant access to a number of people, but limited what times of the day their print will open the lock. Stainless steel plus bio-metric technology, need we say more?

Camera Gadgetry

Sometimes you trust your house guests, sometimes you don’t. Worried that the maid is cleaning your wallet better than your bedroom? Consider installing a hidden camera. There are seemingly endless ways of obscuring your spying, but one of our favorites options was this cute little teddy bear camera. So innocent looking, no one would expect it to be capable of recording audio and color video.

A slick gadget that you keep on your person is the Zippo style lighter/camera/microphone. It will light your cigar, but also has the capability to capture video and sound, using up to an 8 GB SD card. The best feature, though, is the eagle and torch detailing on the outside of the lighter, with the Stars and Stripes in the background. America!

When you are throwing a large party, you need a way to keep tabs on a wandering crowd. To ensure no one is roaming the back 40 when they shouldn’t be, fire up your remote control spy plane. Looks like a hobby, acts like a Cold War double-agent. Circle this plane around the property and take up to 26 digital photos from the sky. No more wondering who sneaked off to pee in your backyard pond. Of course, if the plane is shot down, best to deny it’s existence.

Playing Fort

The ultimate security is invisibility. One cannot rob, what cannot be seen. Creative Home Engineering understands this and specializes in building hidden rooms in your house. And they are really good at it. A bookshelf can swivel or a staircase could lift to reveal a vault, or your kids’ playroom. You want to win father of year? Install a hidden video game room. For security rooms, the company can build you a kevlar-steel composite armored door (read: bullet proof), and sync it up with your home security system. Kevlar, stainless-steel locking pins, vaults – you might also win bad-ass of the year. 

Almost as cool as the secret door (mirror, refrigerator, clothing chest, etc) is how you open them. For example, one home owner has a moving fireplace, a la Indiana Jones, that is activated by moving 3 pieces of the nearby chess board to specific points on the board. You can choose both the type of door and opening mechanism, but be prepared to pay. The hidden passage can cost you up to $50,000. Considering you could use it to hide your baseball card collection or a mistress, the price seams like a bargain.