10. Their “Fat Old Bastard” target marketing is working well in Washington

9. They have gotten a great deal on food from China that will save them millions. They have been assured that it only kills pets.

8. They have added a new “Rosie hybrid” campaign that includes low calorie foods in the morning and lunch but 12 cookies and ice cream for dinner.

7. Have adopted a plan similar to the cell phone companies that people will sign up for in January and then try to quit but will not be able to get out of the two year contract unless they pay a huge fee.

6. Dan Marino=brilliant. If Dan Marino can lose weight anyone can. As we know, millionaire professional athletes have the toughest time taking off weight.

5. Have started HUGE marketing campaign with the Ultimate Fighting Championship league with the slogan “Being Fat is Like Getting Your Ass Kicked by Chuck Liddell”

4. New Spokesmodel : Gisele……. enough said there

3. The people who have shorted the stock live in Portland and think the rest of the nation is skinny as well.

2. If it doesn’t, Fly is going to berate everyone with F bombs until it does.

1. America is made up of a bunch of fat, non exercising, overeating, I’ll do anything to lose weight, I believe anything celebrities tell me especially athletes, too lazy to cook healthy meals people.

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