1. 9/11 Memorial Museum opens, is kind of offensive
A new institution dedicated to the victims of the 2001 attacks debuted with reams of moving footage and artifacts—and a $24 admission fee, fancy cocktail reception and a gift shop that sells commemorative dog vests and cheese plates. Let’s get some perspective here, people. [Gothamist]

2. Thai military stages coup, assumes control of country
Amid political instability, Thailand’s army declared martial law before ultimately taking over, marking the nation’s 24th coup in 82 years. Maybe put that tropical getaway on hold for now. [Forbes]

3. Will Ferrell and Chad Smith face off in drum battle
Adding to a rich history of celeb faux-rivalries on talk shows, the comedian and the Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer matched sticks in a “traditional drum-off.” Naturally, a cowbell was involved. [Rolling Stone]

4. Tennessee brings back electric chair
Citing a scarcity of lethal-injection drugs, the state government has decided to reintroduce the electric chair, giving prisoners no alternate option. Not that injection is doing so hot right now, but electrocution is all kinds of cruel and unusual. We suck, America. [Christian Science Monitor]

5. Brand-new meteor shower to hit the skies tonight
Meet the Camelopardalids, a never-before-seen meteor shower that may or may not put on quite a show Friday night into Saturday morning (10:30pm–4am EDT). Scientists predict that this may be an even cooler spectacle than the Perseids, so grab a blanket and get thee to a dark sky. [Washington Post]

6. Donald Sterling’s wife, Shelly, to negotiate Clippers sale
Following a lifetime ban from the NBA for a series of racist remarks, the L.A. Clippers owner is leaving the handover of the team to his better half. Like…way, way better. [ESPN]

7. Crocodile injured by falling accountant
When a circus tour bus hit a bump on the road, a 265-pound number cruncher was thrown from her seat and onto a sleeping croc named Fedya. While the croc suffered no internal injuries, he did puke for three hours straight. The accountant was fine. We have so many questions.
[Moscow Times]

8. Judge lifts ban on force-feeding at Guantánamo
A federal judge has decided to permit the military to force-feed a Gitmo detainee on hunger strike, a measure she considers cruel but necessary under the circumstances. She went on to strongly chastise the Obama administration for their refusal to compromise. [New York Times]

9. New York Times writer trades soap for cleansing bacteria
Scribe Julia Scott went without soap, shampoo and deodorant for a month to test a new “bacterial skin tonic” being developed at a startup in Cambridge, MA. Though the treatment noticeably improved her skin, she wound up smelling pretty bad. [New York Times]

10. Entertainment Weekly ranks all the X-Men ever
Just in time for the opening weekend of X-Men: Days of Future Past, Darren Franich counted his down his worst-to-best list of the many mutants in Marvel’s most sprawling universe. His pick for No. 1—Wolverine—won’t surprise you. (The correct answer is, however, Gambit.) [EW.com]