12 Places to Pick Up Chicks

After a while it seems like you’re always running rounds in the same places. There’s the coffee shop, the bar or the work world – and that pretty much sums up your life’s entirety of female socialization habitats. Right?

Hell no! Most people meandering around major metropolis areas forget that in other places on this planet, people meet by random coincidence, anywhere any time, and therein meet a great variety of women (instead of the same B version of the barbie doll commonly found in bars and/or working at the coffee shop). Ironically, in order to experience this kind of mysterious, unplanned meeting, you’ll have to plan it wisely…

Below’s a party bag of best picks, however odd and seemingly sterile they may seem to the untrained eye, for picking up chicks. You’ll want to forage some new seduction territory in order to place yourself in the line of fire (‘fire’ meaning …chicks), to experience something more exciting than that run of the mill bedspring bounce. Beware: Be Brave.

#1 Nail Salon

So, this might seem like a suicide, but in fact it can be successful. You’ll need an excuse, of course, like telling your manicurist that you need the nails on your right hand treated and strengthened, because you’re learning the guitar. Your feigned embarrassment and sheer inexperience at the nail salon will warrant your leaning over and planting conversational seeds with your neighbor, who will most likely be melted by a dude interested enough in guitar and confident enough in his own masculinity to make his way to a nail salon. Whatever you do though, don’t act like you’re having a jolly old time in the big chair and make sure to leave your man-purse at home for this one.

#2 Exercise Class

NOTE: I recommend only pursuing this option if you are vaguely physically fit and won’t fall awkwardly behind in the class, highlighting your excessive sweating and inability to keep up with a bunch of tough women. If you can manage to make sweatpants and a fitted tee worth it, you’re a totally justifiable candidate.

Every day, countless women congregrate at the same exercise classes. Can you imagine that? You better – it’s pretty much a feeding ground. Because most males are too unwilling to wander into such situations, you’ll most likely be the only one of your kind. Get in there, find a chick worth approaching and, after class, tell her that she’s got seriously impressive guns. Teasing women about their superior strength is actually very attractive to them.

#3 Mac Store

Maybe you haven’t noticed, but the MAC store is the new watering hole. People wander around trying every and any technological dream – grown, giddy kids in a really expensive candy store. Stride in and either: A) single out a chick testing the appliances and go sneak a share at the screen or B) single out a chick working there and create a complex problem to pick her brain about, resulting in a mound of material for improvised conversation and plenty of time to do the conversing.

#4 Ski Lodge

If you’ve got a snow mountain somewhere within a couple hours of your home, take a weekend trip with a couple friends. On ski trips, there are ample opportunities not only to meet women, but to actually be around them for considerable amounts of time. The chair lift line, the lodge, the lodge bar, the hotel lobby, the hotel bar… You get the idea. Moreover, most chicks on ski trips are predisposed to a good time and excited to have escaped their less romantic, cut and dry, big city reality. You ought to be to take advantage of it.

#5 Live Shows

For some reason, people in big cities rarely frequent live music venues anymore. When it comes to finding women, though, this is a must. Jump up on that dance floor and discreetly make your way beside the babe of your wishing (be careful not too slide over in too much a stalker-style). Appear to be fully involved in the awesomeness of the music, casually looking over to her and smiling – no winking, nodding, head-grooving or anything other than a calm, casual smile. She’ll be convinced you’re not just a sleeze trying to come onto her. Whether she’s right or not, doesn’t matter in the end.

#6 Dog Park

Don’t have a dog? Borrow a friend’s. Say you’re puppy sitting. Women let your little monsters frolic around while they sit patiently on benches making conversation with common dog owners, reading magazines, painting their nails, etc. In a waiting environment, there’s not that rushed, awkward pressure to perform and you can easily draw her in by placating her obsession for her rat-resembling puppy.

#7 Antique Market

Women revel in overpriced, heavily sought-after, ancient junk. They spend hours prowling around shops, plowing through boxes, buying bizarre lampshades. The kind of woman frequenting an antique market is most likely extremely interesting and/or possibly extremely rich. Wander in and ask her for help picking out a small gift for your mother and BINGO, you’ve bought yourself a first date.

#8 School Reunion

I’m not going to lie, I think this sounds a little scary, too. But I also know that many a man has been greatly satisfied by dropping past his school reunion and seeing for himself that librarian Wendy really did get hot. Hole up in a corner near the punch bowl and keep replenishing your store, while getting first pick of the chicks passing the beverage table, and you just may meet someone worth at least a few your Sunday mornings.

#9 Cooking Class

Any heterosexual man enrolled in a cooking class already has a fantastic chance of finding an admirer. Predominantly filled with ambitious young women, divorced women, newly single women, women in groups, cooking classes are essentially the adult version of science class in high school – you’re paired up with a partner and given team activities, forcing you to interact. It is probably one of the only times that being terrible in the kitchen will GET you affection.

#10 Bike Path

We’re coming upon the Spring and Summer set of months that encourage excessive outdoor participation in the act of existence. How perfect for a search such as this one. Taking a bike down by a beach or boardwalk area where people congregate during overwhelming sun splendor is an ideal way to link up with a lady. There’s no more comfortable or casual environment than that of outdoor physical activities, particularly because she doesn’t need to waste time worrying about standing around uselessly in a bikini. Feign a rough fall. If you’re dedicated enough to scrape up your knee, you may just pick up someone who’s willing to bandage your boo-boo.

#11 Victoria’s Secret

This is a delicate matter. And don’t try it if you’re a useless actor (i.e lier). Go in there, scanning the garments insecurely and flag down a gorgeous saleswoman (you won’t have to look hard, they hire them that way). Tell her that your younger sister has just gotten engaged and your mother has asked you to swing by the store and pick up her bachlorette gift of sensual nighty. This is the perfect opportunity to display how awkward you feel about the whole situation and offer a lot of room for you to talk up a storm. Make sure your story about the sister is well crafted, but vague. Don’t get into too much detail and try to steer the focus from her to you as soon as you possibly can.

#12 Group Dance Lessons

Don’t underestimate the greatness of this gem – single ladies, enthusiastic bridesmaids and hot teachers galore. Yes, you may have to make an ass of yourself. But …will it really be the first time you’ve done so for the sake of sex? Yeah. Enough said.

 

 

 

 

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