So it’s early February. It’s getting chilly out. And James Harden’s beard is scoring 27 points a game for the 33-15 Houston Rockets.
What does that all add up to? It’s time to set the razor down and let those follicles breathe a bit.
Seriously, even if you’ve never grown serious facial hair before, it’s not that difficult. Just follow these three simple tips and your follicles will bow down to your greatness.
1. Don’t let your beard go untamed like a wild animal. Contrary to popular belief, beards require grooming. Trim it regularly with a buzzer on a “large” or “high” setting. Also, beards look best full and even, so note your natural facial hair patterns. If it’s patchy after a few weeks, this may not be the best look for you. If it’s hearty and robust, carry on.
2. Beards make a face look fuller and rounder. If your face is long and narrow, they can really balance out your appearance. On the flip side, if you have a round face and want to de-emphasize that/not look like Hagrid from the Harry Potter films, back away from the beard.
3. An unwashed beard is a scary beard. Seriously. No woman wants to know what you had for dinner last night simply by looking at your face. Keep your beard conditioned and clean and treat it like the hair on your head by washing daily with a mild shampoo and conditioner.
Those are the basics. Perhaps you look better clean-shaven, or perhaps you have the potential for the greatest beard in history and just don’t know it yet. When in doubt, grow it out. Because unlike, say, a face tattoo, you can always shave it off later.