Bachelor parties are cliche simply because of the fact that every guy has one before he attaches the ball and chain. These events exist for one reason, and one reason only. They exist to give the future groom a last look at freedom, as this will be the last chance to indulge in a night of debauchery before “he” becomes a “we.” Because of this, bachelor parties must include certain key aspects that can’t help but be cliche. Without these essential yet cliche features of a bachelor party, said party wouldn’t be considered a true bachelor party. These four bachelor party cliches are actually essentials to the party.
Alcohol. Bring a boat load of it. Everyone’s mission at a bachelor party is to get totally trashed. No club sodas here, especially for the groom to be. Yes, this cliche yet essential aspect of a bachelor party is so imperative, that the other key elements to a bachelor party would lose their respective flames without the alcohol. The night is supposed to be a blur. If it isn’t, then you have just failed at throwing and or hosting a bachelor party.
Crazy friends. The people you invite are of the utmost importance. First of all, none of the future wife’s friends can attend, period. It’s a conflict of interest. Don’t do it. Secondly, you can’t invite the uptight buddies either. You can only invite the crazy, wild, over the top guys that have no problem flirting with, and making out with, the girls you’ll meet long the way. Remember, the party can only be as fun as the people that come.
Entertainment. You know what it is. You need some good looking, wild, nasty strippers. You want the veterans. You want the girls that’ll get down. You don’t want those clock soakers that barely dance, or spend their time chatting. You want the professional snake tamers to get in there and put on a show. Anything less, and your bachelor party will suck. Be selective with which girls you choose and spend as much time picking out your entertainment as you do picking out the alcohol.
Video recording. Yes, it’s cliche, but you have to do it. How else will any of you remember the night? Everything should be documented. Every nasty little detail should be recorded for future reference. This way, no one can deny what they did, how they did it, and who they did it with. Also, make sure that the best man keeps the tape locked up. Seriously, a leaked bachelor party tape can lead to an early divorce, along with marital problems for the other folks showcased on that tape. It should only be watched when the women folk aren’t around. As a matter of fact, keep a lookout at the door whenever you’re viewing it.