The economy has taken a toll on us all and we’ve even had to cut back on things like food and toothpaste in order to hold on to the important things in life. Things like booze and the device that unscrambles the adult channels. We’re sure you’ve been facing the same dilemmas, so we set out to find all the places you can get free shit. And you don’t even have to steal it which is a bonus if you don’t want to go to prison.
Ever wonder what all that ‘reward’ stuff is plastered on every case or 2-liter of Coke and Sprite? Start looking a little closer. Each case and 2-liter bottle has a code attached to it. Jot down the code, go to the Rewards site and sign up. Then enter your codes and get points for them. After you’ve amassed a high number in points, you can cash them in for free stuff. Airline tickets, movie tickets, clothing, and music are just a few of the things you can get with your Coke bucks. Sure, you put on an extra twenty pounds with all the Coke you drank, but it’s free!

Things you can’t get for free here: Prostitutes

Costco/Sam’s Club
These two titans of all things wholesale may not be giving you much of the free stuff, but if you plan accordingly, you can eat until you’re stuffed just from all the samples they give out on every isle. We like heading in around lunch time, grabbing a cup of free juice, then make the rounds. The mini-sausages, the finger sandwiches, the turkey burger bites, the chips with dip, and the clam chowder. Repeat your rounds until ‘lunch’ is over, then head over for some dessert at the pudding and cookie tables. And on the weekends, they have wine and liquor samplings to tie in all the flavors. Oh, and don’t forget to grab a few of the mixed nuts sample on the way out. Those will come in handy for a mid-afternoon snack.

Things you can’t get for free here: A kind word from a stranger

McDonalds, for Coffee
Every Monday until August 3rd, McDonalds is giving out free coffee to try and prove they have made some vast improvements of late. You get all their little flavored creams to dump in them, too. Even though this is ending in August, they claim they’ll continue offering this promotion sporadically from here until the end of time. While you’re getting your free coffee, snag a pocketful of napkins, because those are free, too.

Things you can’t get for free here: A life
This site has links to…totally free stuff. You can get CD’s, gift cards, clothes, and all sorts of free samples. You may have to jump through a hoop or two for some of the products — like take a survey or send them pictures of your next-door neighbor sunbathing — but what wouldn’t we do for free stuff?

Things you can’t get for free here: Good advice; snow tires

Soup Kitchens
Call it what you will, but a brother’s gotta’ eat. And why let the homeless people bogart all the free food? The advantage you have here over the homeless is computer access to look up the directory of every shelter and soup kitchen in the nation. Most of these kitchens have daily free meals they give out, so throw on some old clothes, check your conscience at the door, and bon apetit!

Things you can’t get for free here: A ticket out of Hell
This is kind of like NetFlix for cheap bastards and comes in extra handy for all those crappy movies your mom buys you for Christmas because they had a deal at Wal-Mart where you get five free DVDs for every pack of batteries you buy. To get your mitts on some free flicks, sign up and send in the DVDs you’ve been using as coasters. Once you get to 10 DVDs in your ‘DVD Tower’, you are allowed to start receiving them yourself. They actually have a somewhat decent selection and also a book and CD program if you are up for more freeness. What we don’t recommend:

Things you can’t get for free here: Porn