Archives for February 2008

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Stupid Act of the Week

Google gave out free phones and voice mail to homeless people this week. Why? You think a guy living on the street needs to check his voice mail? Who the f they going to call? If they had someone to call they probably would be sleeping on their couch instead of the revolving door at Citibank. How about a meal or better yet a place to sleep the night. Heck let's go crazy and give them some em …

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You Have To Be Crazy to Buy Sprint

Sprint bombed just as expected at yesterday's earnings. A $29.5 Billion dollar bomb. What people probably didn't expect was the mass exodus of customers from Nextel. Here was the official announcement today at earnings The writedown put Nextel's value at 80 percent less than when it was acquired and the loss is the fifth-largest among Standard & Poor's 500 Index companies since 1990. Sprint e …

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Had a Busy Night So I Leave You With This Very Funny Joke

Three turtles, Troy, Andy and Wayne, decide to go on a picnic.Troy packs the picnic basket with beer and sandwiches. The trouble is that the picnic site is ten miles away so it takes them ten days to get there.When they get there, Troy unpacks the food and beer."Ok Wayne give me the bottle opener""I didn't bring it" says Wayne"I thought you packed it"Troy gets worried, He turns to Andy, "Did you b …

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8 Signs You May Not Be Very Good At Sports

Being smaller or a little geeky doesn't guarantee you won't succeed at sports but the following 8 signs point you towards a slight lacking in athletic ability. Nothing says "I don't have a good jump shot" like the colorful "two bicycles and a helicopter" rainbow sweater that Aunt Susie made for you Darth Vader costume = likely to be bad at sports Violin= very likely to be bad at sport …

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Where the Hell Do I Put My Money?

This is a question we're all asking ourselves right now. The times of easy day trading aren't with us right now and so we need to concentrate on long term wealth. When it comes to retirement this is a no brainer. A diversified portfolio of the stock market with a few percentage of bond indexes thrown in is still the best place to put your money. Heck, it's 20% cheaper than it was a few months …

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Air Force Obamas

Anyone with mad hops like this deserves to be President And their own kicks

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The 2010 Death Watch

I often joke about the fact that if you have are going to have your rich relative die you want them to die in 2010. The reason behind this is there is no estate tax that year and that year only. What may not end up being funny is that some people may actually act on it. I have a feeling some crazy is going to kill a relative just to avoid taxes. You heard it here first. It WILL happen (no not …

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10 Ways to Guarantee Terrible Acceptance of Your Products New Website

Trying to release a new product and use a website to promote it? Here are 10 ways that will certainly ensure that your product will not be adopted by the web community.1. Give it a URL that only people within the company can remember.You won't spend the $500 that it takes to buy a good name from the name squatter and so your web name is agreatharddrivebackup.com2. Make Sure the Username and Pas …

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Protecting Your Assets By Gene Simmons

How in the world does a sex tape teach me to be a better businessman you might ask? You may not have heard, but a sex tape with Gene Simmons has recently been offered for sale at an Internet site. For a mere $9.95 you can watch the long tongued Kiss member put his other member into a nice young blond haired model. I learned a few lessons/positions from the tape but I also learned a few lessons on …

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As Economy Slips, Yacht Sales Skyrocket

courtesy of ABC NewsBy SCOTT MAYEROWITZABC NEWS Business UnitFeb. 21, 2008 — Forget all the talk about mortgage foreclosures and a looming recession. Instead, close your eyes and imaging yourself on a boat sailing the Caribbean. Not just any boat, but a megayacht that is two to three times the size of your house. On board is every luxury you could ever imaging. You can lounge in a Jacuzzi …

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Hedge Fund Manager Speaks out Against Bernanke

FOX Business Network’s “Cavuto” program last night had Bill Fleckenstein, president of Fleckenstein Capital, a hedge fund based in Seattle. During this interview, he talks about the threat of stagflation and provides commentary on what Bernanke could be doing better. I agreed with 100% of what he was saying. I think we need to have some paid before we can have more gain. In …

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Top 10 Signs That Wendys May Be Going Out of Business

10. The finger is back on the menu. Now in 3 finger and "The Handful" sizes.9. The kids at the drive through are going to actually start making eye contact when giving back change to every fourth customer.8. Hoping to catch some of the Chipotle crowd they are introducing a new menue item called "The Mexican Burger" . It is a bacon double cheeseburger made by "a Mexican"7. They have done away …

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Sony Pulled the Technology Coup of this Generation

Sony pulled off one of the fastest takeovers of a technology in the history of business. With the demise of HD DVD, that leaves Sony's Blue-Ray and the stand alone in the High Definition Disc market. Not only are they the only one left standing but they also have the cheapest Blu-Ray player out there. Why in the world wouldn't you buy the PS3? You get the system AND the player. I don't care if you …

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8 Signs That You May Be A Drunk

There is nothing easier than spotting a drunk. It doesn't matter who they are or where they're from, they all have the same characteristics. Here are the 8 sure signs you're a drunk. The strangest shit is always happening to your car. One day you get your mirrors kicked off , the next you have a giant fork through the top of it. You ALWAYS want to wrestle. One second I'm standing in line for t …

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Another Great Article from Ben Stein

Stein is by far my favorite financial writer of all time. Here's another great articleWe're currently in very stormy seas investment-wise. There have been dramatic moves downward on every index I know of. The media is filled with tales of gloom and doom.In such times, we all need advice on how best to ruin our investing lives. With that in mind, try the following:1. Panic.That's right, get scared …

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Oil and Gas Are Getting Ugly

There was an interesting interview with Eric Bolling, and oil specialist on crude oil. He knows his stuff and he and I agree. Either oil has to come down or fuel has to come up and guess what? Oil isn't going down unless some of this bad news turns positive. I know two things, time is money and money is money. I built a house two miles from where I work. Why? I don't want to waste my life d …

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10 of the Most BadAss Disco Shirts as Found on Ebay

As many of you know I love to stay ahead of the fashion curve. As a man of wealth and culture, occasionally I have to take a step back in time to stay ahead of future trends. I'm getting a jump on Soho and starting to rock the hard core vintage 70's disco shirts. Ladies and gentleman, let me introduce to you my 10 Bad Ass Disco Shirts As Found on Ebay. A few simple rules to the kind of shirts I'll …

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Kenny G Is Not Cheesy. Hes Making the Cheese

You may ask yourself, "How in the world do the words Kenny G and shrewd investor find themselves in the same sentence?". First, let me tell you I love Kenny G. He has provided me years of comedic material. There is nothing better than slipping in a Kenny G CD into the stereo at the beginning of road trip with friends to get everyone laughing. I always follow with "What? You guys don't like Kenny G …

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Circuit City To Give It One Last Try

Circuit City has been getting it's hard drive handed to it over the last few years. After getting killed by 50 year old salespeople on commission and a purchasing division that seemed to order product only AFTER it became popular, Circuit City is going to try a different approach. According to the Tribune Circuit City Stores Inc. Chief Executive Philip Schoonover is hoping he can make more out of …

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Pictures That Make Me Cringe

I know these are only photos but they still make me nervous. This is what I am afraid my wife is going to do every time she makes dinner. I frickin hate shaved monkeys, always have, always will. They startle me I know this is a "safe pool" at the edge of a waterfall but it still makes me nervous with him laying there like this

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My Romance with a Scammer From Ghana

You know you've always wanted to. I finally responded to one of the scammers that send you those messages about money waiting for you if you'd help. I got the typical help me letter and I responded with this I am interested but send me a picture of the money. I want to see it first Sincerely, Ihava Grandepinga Like my name? Ihava Grandepinga This is the first response I received. …

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Stop Complaining. At Least You Dont Have to Eat Dirt Cakes

In Haiti, the poorest country in the western hemisphere, 80 percent of the population lives on less than $2 a day. The mud cookies sell for around five cents each, compared to 60 cents for two cups of rice.Made from dirt, salt and vegetable shortening, the cookies (which are regularly used by pregnant women and children as an antacid and source of calcium) have become a regular meal for Haitia …

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I Dont Think I Can Take 8 More Months of The Election Process

This is frickin ridiculous. Every station, every website, every where I turn, they're talking and speculating about the election. I used to love going over to Digg and enjoying some real news combined with "7 crazy things you never cared about but is funny or interesting" stories. Now they barely make it to the top being drowned out by political stories. And forget about Reddit, it's gone until …

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10 Signs That Hillary is Getting Desperate For Votes and Money

10. Set up a dunk booth at the last campaign stop with a "Dunk Hillary for $5.01" Sign9. Pushing rumors to the media that she has a sex tape with Jessica Alba and Carry Underwood8. Has hired Morgan Freeman to narrarate all stories about her on the news for better effect7. Has decided to switch from the power suit to the Catholic School Girl outfit for the rest of the campaign stops6. Has star …

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What a Problem. This Guy Has to Spend $300 Million in the Next Two Weeeks or He Loses It

How awesome would it be to be able to have this problem? $300 Million to Burn, With a Catch function getSharePasskey() { return 'ex=1360558800&en=585144a8f6abacdc&ei=5124';} function getShareURL() { return encodeURIComponent('http://www.nytimes.com/2008/02/12/business/12sorkin.html'); } function getShareHeadline() { return encodeURIComponent('$300 Million to Burn, With a Catch'); } functio …

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GM Motors Confirms Their Company Sucks in Earnings Release

Today GM confirms what most shareholders already know, they suck. Here's a synopsis of their earnings General Motors Corp. reported a $38.7 billion loss for 2007 on Tuesday, the largest annual loss ever for an automotive company, and said it is making a new round of buyback offers to U.S. hourly workers in hopes of replacing some of them with lower-paid help. GM was profitable in every region out …

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Interesting Pictures That Look Photoshopped But Arent Part 2

After the reaction to my first group of interesting photos I've decided to post a second group of photos. Again, all of these are regular photos and none of them have been altered or photoshopped. Usually I'll comment on the photos but I'll let everyone submit their own this time. On the first one, take a step back and take a look. It's like she's behind a curtain. One of the most beaut …

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From the Archives: I No Longer Pick Up Pennies

I was watching 60 minutes last night as saw a story of how it now costs the U.S. 2.5 cents to make a penny and a dime to make a nickel. Another part of the story was about the worthlessness of the penny. They compared it to our appendix and another calculated that it costs each American $41 to use the penny because the time wasted waiting for change or trying to find it. It got me thinking about t …

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