Archives for August 2007

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10 Signs That John Chow Has Been Over For Dinner

10. There's a $100,000 sports car parked in the driveway9. After he leaves, 10,000 people stop by to see what John had for dinner8. Every dish was photographed before eaten7. The centerpiece of the table had advertising on it6. Between the appetizer and the main course somebody sold the centerpiece advertising to somebody else for more money5. The desert was a donation and was given to t …

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Bob Stops By

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs.When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor.Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you 800 dollars to drop that to …

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Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare Beta Registration

If you're like me, one of the finest games in history has been Call of Duty. It's perfect because you don't have to play 10 hours straight (sometimes I do anyway) to have fun. You can pick it up, kill some people for a few hours and pick up next week. The game also takes advantage of the each new systems graphic ability. Good news for all you "I have to have it first" people. They are now signing …

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Costume Party

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going.So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hou …

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The Official Out List of Hollywood

I know that most of you don't care but my wife and I like to play the "I know he's gay because" game . I found this list interesting because there are a few people I knew were gay or bi but there are a few I really can't believe. This list is from the official out Jonathan Jaxson, a former publicist (graphic language on site) . Here's the list. Believe it if you will but he's been very right on a …

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Big Bug

A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing about his deplorable fidelity practices when suddenly, the woman reaches over and slices off the mans penis and angrily tosses it out the window of the car.Driving behind the car is a pickup truck with a man and his 10 year old daughter chatting away beside him. All of the sudden, the penis smacks the pickup in the windshield and flies off.Surpr …

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Joke of the Day: My Sheep

A man buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a veterinarian for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.The guy doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet …

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I Think Theres A Hurrican Coming To the Yucatan Peninsula?

Just got back from Playa del Carmen and I took these photos with my iPhone. The clouds that are forming are incredible and it looks like heaven or a big storm coming. Not photoshopped but exposure definitely off in second picture

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The Klondike Roast Of The Week

Our frosty, nom-able partner’s in crime, Klondike, want you to make fun of your friends. We want that, too. Sounds hilarious. So they made a facebook app called “Roast-a-Friend” just so you can get away with it.  The idea is that you embarass, enrage, or otherwise demean your friends in the hopes that they have a thick, delicious shell (not unlike a certain frosty treat we know), and that everybod …

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Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo Naked Pictures/Photos

Somebody needs to tone up and buy a razor. Click on the little pictures if you want the naked version. I don't tend to post nudity on my site but celebrity nudity doesn't count. A lot of money has been paid to keep Nick's stuff out of the pictures and the hardcore photos out of the news but after seeing the "free" stuff I think I'll pass on the hardcore For More Beautiful Women from Wallstr …

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Great Comedic Quotes

Courtesy of Reader's DigestHave you ever noticed that anybody going slower than you is an idiot and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?George CarlinHow many people here have telekinetic powers? Raise my handEmo PhilipsI'm not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happensWoody AllenWhen I was a little kid, we had a quicksand box. I was an only child.......eventuallySteven …

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How to Make a Porno Name

I was told this is how you create your porno name. You take the name of your first pet and add a street you lived on Mine Puppy Stone Creek Yours? PS: That girl to the left used to be Jenna Jameson

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Why Women Hate to Take Men on Vacation

I'm leaving on vacation tomorrow for Playa del Carmen, Mexico. I thought I'd leave you a little example of why women hate taking men with them on vacation