How To Do It: Wear nothing but shorts and shoes underneath a trench coat. Extra points for creepy sunglasses.
What It Says About You: I’m edgy and probably a little perverse.
What She’ll Say: “What’s underneath your coat?”
Nudist On Strike
How To Do It: This is an updated version of the “I’m a serial killer. We look just like everyone else” idea. Just wear whatever you’d normally wear. Hold a sign that says “Nudists Union Local #94213 ON STRIKE.”
What It Says About You: You had a way creepier costume idea than this.
What She’ll Say: “What do we need to do to end this labor dispute?
How To Do It: Make a box around your head and shoulders with two curving cuts at the bottom for the boobs. Label it “FREE MAMMOGRAMS.” Is there a cheesier costume? Not that we know of.
What It Says About You: I’m a boob man and I don’t care who knows it.
What She’ll Say: “Is this equipment approved by the AMA?”
How To Do It: Wrap your body in a circle of poster board. Have another piece sticking off tangentially (get out your high school geometry book, kids) for the loose part of the roll. This can also be done with old sheets.
What It Says: I’ve got a self-deprecating sense of humor.
What She’ll Say: “I’ve got a job for you.”