People say that things are bigger in Texas. But that’s a grossly oversimplified stereotype. Because things are bigger, but they’re also more fried.

Take the State Fair of Texas. Located in Dallas and taking place right now, it’s one of the largest fairs in the country. And beyond all the rides, the supersized mascot and the millions of people who attend each year, it’s best known for its collection of deep-fried foods. Standard offerings like the famous Fletcher’s corndogs are accompanied by a bevy of new options each year—with each trying to outdo the others. So as the fair just kicked off over the weekend, we’ve compiled some of the craziest new foods available. Go forth, sample liberally and bring some Tums.

Fried Jell-O (pictured above)
Here you’ve got your classic cherry-flavored Jell-O made less classic by a panko-crusted breading. All that is flash-fried into golden spheres and then dusted with powdered sugar and topped with whipped cream. Calories per serving: approximately a billion.

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Injectable Great Balls of BBQ
Why eat barbecue when you can inject it straight into your veins? It’s a good question worth considering. While you do that, here’s something that walks the line. Shredded, smoke-crusted brisket with bock barbecue sauce is molded into balls, which are then coated with seasoned breadcrumbs and deep-fried. Those come served atop a bed of coleslaw, and each order gets a pipette of that barbecue sauce to be injected into the brisket balls. The word “wow” comes to mind.

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Cookie Fries
These crinkle-cut fries are actually cookies available in two varieties—chocolate chip and sprinkles. And since you’ll need something to dip them into, you can choose between strawberry and milk chocolate sauce. Gosh, who knew you could make fries unhealthy?

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Caribbean Pineapple Korn-a-Copia
Hey, some fruit. Sort of. Yellow Caribbean fried rice is topped with marinated grilled chicken and shrimp, plus tropical salsa and a pineapple rum glaze. Pop all that into a partially hollowed-out half pineapple and call it a day.

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Doritos Bacon Mozzarella Cheese Stick
All right, now they’ve done it. A stick full of mozzarella has been covered with bacon, of course. And then dipped into a Dorito batter, naturally. And fried, because those are the rules. Serve it with a special marinara and ranch sauce, and we bet you can’t eat… one.