Having a wingman is a luxury that you just won’t have all the time. Sure, when you were a kid, it was necessary to follow the buddy system. But, you’re all grown up now, and you need to figure out how to go at things on your own. You don’t need a friend to have your back at the laundromat, do you? You don’t need a spotter to do your job or drive your car. Then why is it necessary to have a wingman to go out with? It isn’t, you’ve just been conditioned to think you need one. You’re going to learn how to fly solo when you need to. Use these four tips for going out without a wingman.

Find a temporary wingman. If your biggest fear is looking like the dork in the club with no friends, then you have nothing to worry about. There are a lot of other guys that’ll be standing around eye hawking women. You can always grab one if you need them. They can be your safety net. And, no dude is going to turn you down if you say you’ve got a group of hot chicks you’re trying to crack. Here’s the thing, if you follow the rest of the tips, you won’t even need any help.

Give them something to see. Don’t go guns blazin‘ into a group of girls. Even with a wingman this tactic very rarely works. Give them a chance to scope you out. Here’s a hint. Whether or not you know it, women check you out, and within a matter of seconds they know if they’ll give you a shot. So give them something to see. Walk by the group and act like you barely notice them. As you pass, give the one you like just enough eye contact where she’s guessing if you’re interested. If she likes you, she’ll be watching you walk by. Now is still not the time to jump on her. You need to eliminate your prime obstacle first.

girl circle

Breaking circles. The biggest obstacle that a guy faces when approaching a woman he likes is the friends that surround her. The whole purpose of a wingman is to be the person that creates that buffer between you and her friends, so that you can get to her. Well without that wingman, you need to do it yourself. First, you need to know who you’re going for. Never let her leave your sight. Secondly, you need to scan her friends and see which one, if any would be most likely to interrupt your advances. She’s the one you initially approach. Introduce yourself to her first. Then to all of the rest of the girls. There shouldn’t be too many of them. Maybe three or four total. Introduce yourself to the one you want last. Remember to give her slightly more lingering eye contact. Now, simply be your personable self while secretly giving the girl you like extra eye attention.

Springing the trap. If you’ve done your job correctly, all of her friends will think you’re cool, the one hater in the bunch will be neutralized, and you will have piqued the interest of your potential love interest. It’s just a simple matter of gravitating closer to her as the night goes on. Once you get her in your orbit, seal the deal like you’ve done many times before.

With a little practice, you’ll learn to break down these circles in record time. You just have to know the right angle to get into the circle, and the rest is like falling dominoes. Follow these simple tips, and after a while, you won’t even need a wingman.