It’s 5 o’clock. Time to ditch work, meet up with your crew and blow off steam. So where do you go? Luckily, there’s a whole “breastaurant” industry targeted right at you. The following guy-friendly joints—none called Hooters—offer quality food and booze served up by overly hot, underly clad waitresses. Yes, this still happens in 2012. Don’t believe us? Check out the gallery and see. —Jason Epstein
Twin Peaks The Place: Twin Peaks offers “eats, drinks and scenic views” across the South, mostly Texas. Where, you know, everything is bigger. The Grub: American pub and comfort foods with a Southwestern twist. Try the poblano and chipotle pepper burger or the cheesy chili mac with venison meat and pico de gallo. Eye Candy: The Twin Peaks girls are playful, energetic bombshells. They rock an outdoorsy red-and-black plaid “lumberjill” top, short-shorts and snow boots. And they aced our March Madness Made Babe Tourney. Did we mention they host bikini contests?
Brickhouse Tavern & Tap The Place: This brick-lined man-cave of a restaurant hosts events like “Bike Night” and “Heroes’ Day” across America, most notably in Chicago, Houston and Orlando. The Grub: Protein-heavy delights like meatloaf sliders, the XXXL 1½-lb. “man-burger” (with tater tots!) and a pizza topped with kobe beef. Oh, and beer bongs. Eye Candy: The waitresses and bartenders are lovely, but the real draw may be the female patrons who turn out for the events. Bring your bike.
Double D Ranch The Place: Just outside of Shreveport, Louisiana, the Double D has a blue-collar vibe, complete with a picnic table and loads of memora-beer-lia adorning the walls. The Grub: Southern comforts like ribs, fried chicken, steaks and po’ boys. The beer selection isn’t huge, but it is nicely priced. Eye Candy: The gorgeous waitresses actually come in a variety of sizes. And the hot pants, big smiles and bare midriffs are enough to make any guy’s eyes wander.
Bone Daddys The Place: Bone Daddy’s House of Smoke has an artsy blues motif and five locations across the great state of Texas. The Grub: BBQ staples like smoked meat sandwiches and platters and a selection of salads that all come with, you guessed it, more meat. Eye Candy: The smokin’ girls of Bone Daddy’s show legs, hips and just the right amount of cleavage whilst serving up the goods. They also deliver your food.
The Tilted Kilt The Place: This pub and eatery is “in the business of selling fun,” can be found across America and even has its own line of merchandise. The Grub: American favorites with some Irish selections and twists on the classics sprinkled in. The Kilt also offers beer, cocktails, wine, shooters, whiskey and their own signature concoctions. Eye Candy: The ladies take the schoolgirl look to another level with Scottish Highlands style plaid mini-kilts, exposed midriffs and tiny tops. Sounds pretty fun to us.
Mugs ’N Jugs The Place: Mugs ’N Jugs is a Tampa area sports paradise with NCAA, NHL, NFL, NBA, UFC, WWE, MLB and NASCAR packages. They even offer Wi-Fi, so you basically never have to leave. The Grub: Award-winning wings, BBQ and burritos, plus a killer happy hour with 99-cent domestic drafts and two-dollar import drafts, so you won’t have to cry yourself to sleep after buying a round. Eye Candy: True to its name, the wait staff here brings both the mugs and the jugs. We think you can figure out what that means.
Bikinis Sports Bar and Grill The Place: Located in three Southern states, Bikinis offers as many high-def TVs tuned to big sports as it does waitresses tuned to tiny shorts. The Grub: Burgers—including a Man Vs. Food-esque five-pounder called the Big Buckin’ Burger, BBQ and tacos. The full bar focuses on nice, ice-cold drafts. Eye Candy: Waitresses in bikini tops stroll the bar balancing platters of wings and frothy mugs of beer. And like Twin Peaks, they host bikini contests. Really, how could they not?
Heart Attack Grill The Place: They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Tell that to the pounds you gain at this hospital-themed yet indulgent joint, improbably owned by Diet Center LLC. The Grub: The Quadruple Bypass Burger packs well over two pounds of beef, plus 20 bacon strips for an extra $3.69. The 22 oz. frozen drinks contain 11 oz. of hard liquor. And, if you weigh over 350, you eat for free. Eye Candy: Did you overdo it? Don’t worry about that failing heart or sickly liver. The waitresses here are dolled up as sexy nurses and ready to… serve you more. Hey, at least you’ll die happy.
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