Ah, the grand transition. Debatably the trickiest part of the dating experience, this step requires the kind of smoothness generally associated with sexually iconic heroes (i.e. Shaft). You’ll need to keep your wits about you and keep your eye on the prize, without making it apparent that you’re following a predetermined master plan. But first, you’ll need to created a predetermined master plan.

Evaluate Your Present Subject

If you’ve been on one or two dates with this girl before, or even known her as a friend for long enough to gain some insight into her romantic tendencies, sit down with yourself and brainstorm here for a bit. Try to remember anything she’s mentioned to you about being offended by male come ons, about why she ended things with other men or about her general policies toward casual sex. If you’ve got even a sliver of information here, it will help you tailor your grand transition particularly to her tastes and, therefore, particularly to yours.

In the event you know nothing, we’ll have to prepare you for battle. This means having an idea of what to do and then having the gall and cleverness to improvise when the actual moment of bullets and bloodshed arrives. (Okay, sorry, scary metaphor).

An Idea of What To Do

Even if you don’t know the girl personally, it’s important to deduce her nationality. If she’s European, this step becomes significantly less difficult, because most European women already assume you’re desperately pondering this possibility and will most likely do whatever she wants whether you like it or not. So, with the Europeans, assume they already know what’s up your sleeves and keep trying anyway – it’s that simple.

In pretty much every other scenario, you’ll need to work on your smooth operator skills. If you’re the sort of man extremely comfortable with asking a woman for her number, you don’t need to worry much. But I’m guessing if you’re that sort of man, you’re probably not reading this article. So, let’s get cracking.

Hypothetical Role-Playing Scenario

The dinner’s been great thus far (NOTE: please only attempt further seduction if you’re not scaring off the ladies yet) and you’re ready to take that fateful leap into the jeep and drive home. But is she? To make the best educated guess, evaluate her body language. Is she leaning toward you? Is she giggling, making eyes, talking comfortably and onto at least her second drink?

If these questions warrant a YES, the next best step is to pull a fast one by remembering something she has mentioned during your dinner conversation that could in any way lead her to your home. This means, her mentioning that she loves old books and you happening to have a collection or you suggesting she see some of the art in your hallway. All these things sound stupid, I know, but they are a rouse after all and it will be your job to deliver them convincingly. Something like this is ideal: "Hey, I know this just sounds like a rouse to get you to come over, but I’d actually really like for you to see the ______ at my place, and then we can go get a drink somewhere else if you’d like."

By acknowledging the rouse, it is a brilliant rouse. Because she thinks you are admitting to the implications, when in reality your admittance only allows her guard to drop and for you to better work her without realizing it. Also, by presenting the offer to leave your place and venture somewhere else afterward, she won’t feel trapped and will therefore be more susceptible to being trapped (i.e. not realizing she’s fallen for it until she’s fallen for it).

The other approach, and the one best suited to those a bit too nervous to dive into sudden alone time in your apartment with a suspicious, strange woman, is to make a small group out of it. Invite a few of your most presentable friends over to your house and say that you were planning to meet up with them after your dinner, but that you’d love for her to meet them as well (women feel special when you say you WANT to introduce them to your friends). Because there will be icebreakers present, she will most likely feel comfortable enough to say yes to the invitation. Once you are both there, have your loyal friends gradually depart, discreetly, leaving you two alone. At this point, you’ll probably have consumed enough wine and enjoyed enough conversation that her armor will already have dropped.

Once she’s in your apartment, try to focus on the couch. The couch is unassuming, and simultaneously convenient, so utilize it as a central location. Pick up a coffee table book you’d "like to show her," sit on the couch, spread the book open in your lap and she’ll be forced to sit closely beside you in order to see it. From here, continually turn coyly toward her while pretending to talk about the book, making eye contact and baiting her smiles by using your own. This position makes the old reach around terribly easy for you. What’s the old reach around? Drawing nearer to her throughout the course of your book tour, until the moment arrives wherein you can slyly slip in a kiss to catch her off guard, to which she will feel comfortable finally responding. And suddenly you’ve broken the ice and, conveniently, the barrier between the dinner bill and the bedroom.