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Made Man is a proud partner of Movember. Grow a mo with mademan.com/ movember.

As you’ve probably realized, the Movember movement is a truly historic development. In its honor, here’s a rundown of other Great Moments in Men‘s Hair. All of this stuff actually happened, we swear.

400 B.C
Samson gets his hair cut and thinks a wheat allergy is responsible for his markedly reduced strength.

880 A.D.
First instance of helmet-hair occurs in a Viking.

1789
Alexander Hamilton becomes the first American to get laid while wearing a powdered wig.

1802
Napoleon briefly loses his complex by sporting a four-foot beehive hairdo.

1872-1901
No one without a handlebar moustache is able to win a bare-knuckle boxing match.

1916
For the 43rd consecutive year, the unbreakable comb doesn’t break.

1935
A man from Crete shaves at 4:30, then has stubble reappear on his face half an hour later.

1939
Hitler invades Poland. The downfall of the small square mustache begins.

1953
Moe of the Three Stooges gets first bowl cut, after Shemp finishes his Corn Flakes.

1954
The coroner’s report on James Dean reveals he died when his skull collapsed from too much pomade.

1968
The musical “Hair” debuts on Broadway. Men don’t give a crap.

1970
Someone forgets the rope for the tug-of-war at a Chattanooga picnic. Willie Nelson volunteers his ponytail.

1973
A British man can’t decide whether to shave his head or grow his hair really high, so does both. The mohawk is born. Several peacocks subsequently try to have sex with him.

1975
Artis Gilmore of the Kentucky Colonels becomes the first pro basketball player to block a shot with his afro.

1978-86
Sy Sperling’s Hair Club for Men becomes either the opening or closing joke of every stand-up comic on Long Island.

1981
After a slow, decades-long migration, Rod Stewart and Phyllis Diller finally have the exact same haircut.

1994
New York Knick Anthony Mason starts carving words into his hair. More people read Mason’s head than the Utne Reader.

1995
Andre Agassi has really, really long hair at Wimbledon and a cavernous bald spot at the French Open. Everyone on the planet, except for Michael Bolton, is perplexed.

2003
Phil Spector remembers to kill someone but forgets to use conditioner.

2050
Hair declared illegal by President Baldy.

Check out mademan.com/movember for more moustached goodness. Then join our mo-growing team at mobro.co/mademan.