Love can make a man go crazy. It can isolate us from our friends, strain relationships with our families, let our gym memberships lapse—it can turn our whole worlds upside down and make us do all types of things we’d never ordinarily do.

We’ve all been there, no?

That’s why when we begin to see our friends go through the slice-and-dice end of the ol’ relationship shredder, our first instinct is to run up in that bitch like a burning building, grab our buddies and get ’em to safety.

Well, men, I’m here to tell you: Unfortunately, playing Captain Kangaroo with your friends’ failing relationships isn’t your job.

And before you get all, “Bros never leave bros behind, bro!” let me explain.

It doesn’t matter whether you’ve been buds for 15 minutes or 15 years, your friends are grown men and they’re capable of making their own decisions. From time to time, they’re going to make bad calls because we all make bad calls sometimes and that’s just how life goes.

But when they do, your job isn’t to sit there and try to make sense of everything for them. You can’t try to make them stop, you can’t try to convince them that they’re being foolish, and you can’t block the phone numbers.

So what can you do?

Well, you can keep a cold sixer in the fridge and the ringer on. As a good friend, it’s your job to show your buds unconditional love when they need it most. That might include helping a buddy move out on short notice. It might include shopping for a good divorce attorney. It can include impromptu road trips, random 3 a.m. phone calls, a bottle of whiskey or all of the above.

What I’m getting at is this: Your friend is always behind the wheel, but you should always be in their passenger seat, never afraid to grab that wheel when they ask for a hand.

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