By Charley Anne Prescott
Nowadays who doesn’t utilize online dating to meet the opposite sex? With the popularity of sites like Match.com, eHarmony, Plentyoffish and many others, online dating via the virtual world is ideal for any guy, who does not have time to get out and meet women on his own. If you are an online dater and you find that your profile just isn’t getting you anywhere, you may need to consider changing up your profile photos.
According to dating coach David Wygant on YAHOO! Personals, “Your pictures are part of what makes — or can ruin — a good profile. Your pictures should also help to create a feeling of emotion inside a woman.”
Scoring actual dates online is not about being the best looking person on the website. It is 100% about how you portray yourself to women, who are deciding if they want to date you in the future, or if you will convince them that you are an undateable guy. Profile photos should tell a bit of a story, revealing certain aspects of who you are, and what your life is like in reality.
In case you need a bit of advice on how to improve bad or uninspiring online dating photos, here are some key things to avoid in your profile —
The cutout. You liked that photo from 18 months ago so much, that you decided to use it for your online dating profile — right after deciding to cut your ex out of the shot. Photos on a dating profile should never include traces of an ex. Nowadays, the majority of us own a digital camera. The solution if you don’t happen to have a camera is to ask a friend or family member to snap a photo of you. If you absolutely have to use a photo taken when you were with your ex, crop the photo properly with a program like Photoscape or Picasa, where it is no longer obvious that your previous girlfriend was ever even there. Please don’t be the guy who puts a big white block on top of his ex-girlfriend’s face or head — definitely not a good look for an online dating profile. Oddly enough, seeing a photo with a huge block over your ex-girlfriend’s face, doesn’t exactly make a woman feel warm and fuzzy, about getting to know you on a personal level.
The messy guy. If you happen to be “organizationally challenged” it is OK — just don’t reflect this fact online. We are all for keeping it real, but people never want to see your absolute worst side in a photo or dating profile — it’s simply too much information entirely too soon. Avoid taking pictures in areas that are messy, or in rooms that look like they belong in a college dormitory. Always skip taking a picture of yourself in your bathroom mirror, if you don’t want to clean off the mirror first. It may sound too particular, but relative to photos the minor details do matter. People notice everything in pictures on dating sites, so you have to remember to examine yours for negative elements. It’s no different than selling a house. If you are actually trying to sell a home that you plan to put on the market, you would make sure everything is in order, before the realtor has an “open house” for the property. Take your entire dating profile, and the photos you post just as seriously.
The poser. During your last trip to Vegas, you saw a hot red Ferrari parked in front of the Venetian, and you decided to have your friend take a photo of you posing beside the car. Although you may love the photo, it does not really reveal anything about your personality to women. We all love exotic luxury cars, but even if you own one, it’s never a good idea to post a photo of it on a dating site. Two things will happen if you post this type of image on a profile. You will definitely succeed in attracting gold diggers — and you will end up turning off substantive women who are looking for relationships with mature men who possess depth.
The playboy. Of course, women know that men often have female friends. In many cases women have male friends that they hang out with too. Generally speaking, women just don’t want to see photos of other chicks plastered on a guy’s online dating profile. Regardless of how much time you spend writing the text of your profile, be aware that the average woman will quickly lose interest, if she catches a glimpse of the gratuitous photo of you with another chick (or chicks). It’s normally a deal breaker. Common scenarios seen on popular dating sites like Match.com, include the guy standing on a beach with two hot women, or in a nightclub or restaurant with eye candy on his arm. Aside from the presence of this type of photo being totally cheesy on a dating site profile — it confuses many people. Anyone looking at the picture will wonder who the random chicks are with you. Were you dating one of the women or what’s the deal? Avoid any confusion by not posting photos of yourself with unknown women. Quality females are searching for relationships with guys who appear trustworthy. When it comes to meeting men in the virtual world of online dating, women rarely waste time with people or situations, where they feel they may have to compete with a multitude of chicks in the future.
The half-naked guy. It’s great to be proud of your body and to take care of yourself, but is it really necessary to place shirtless pictures on a dating profile? The same thing applies to the photo you have in the wife beater that shows off your muscles. For a woman, seeing a scantily clad Calvin Klein underwear model in a fashion magazine is one thing. Unless a female is searching for a quick hookup in the near future, looking at a dating profile is a totally different ballgame. If a woman sees you flexing your muscles in your profile pictures, she will often think you’re entirely too impressed by yourself. Women dig down-to-earth guys who are going to be into them — not themselves.
The bar hopper. We must begin by saying, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a couple of drinks. Unfortunately, a photo of a man holding a bottle of beer as he hangs out in his neighborhood bar, comes across as a tad sketchy to many ladies. If you post a photo like this to your online dating profile, it screams that the bar scene and drinking are both integral parts of your life. Unless you want to attract alcoholics, you may want to drop those drinking photos from your collection of pictures online. Maybe you are worried about meeting a person who does not drink, but all dating sites have questions pertaining to “if” and “how often” you drink. It’s probably a good idea to skip any photos that involve you clutching a beer, or any other alcoholic beverage.
The man with a baby. A woman is going through dating profiles, and she spots a single guy who states that he has no kids holding a baby in one of his pictures. What goes through her head? Questions like whose baby is that, or why did this guy post that picture on his dating profile? Many women love kids, but the photo of a guy holding a baby actually seems a bit cliché.
The grinch. Lighten up, and let your real personality shine through in your photos, by accentuating the positive. Too many men have that why am I here expression on their faces, or a look that screams I hate the world. A man who refuses to smile in his photos, usually appears uninviting to women who happen to be perusing his profile pictures.
You definitely need to know what will grab a woman’s attention visually, and focus on enhancing your profile with certain types of pictures that put your best foot forward.
How to Do it Right – Types of Online Dating Photos Women Want to See
Ultimately, women look at the photos, prior to reading the dating profile. In order to truly succeed with online dating, you have to project an appealing version of who you are with photos and text.
If you want to get anywhere in the online dating arena, posting photos is an essential part of the process. When you don’t have a photo on your profile, you are shooting yourself in the foot so to speak — potentially missing out on making contact with a lot of women.
Chances are you don’t want to hear that everyone is doing it in terms of online dating — yet millions of people really are using this method to meet the opposite sex. No need to be embarrassed about meeting women online — it is pretty commonplace for single people of all ages and backgrounds around the world.
So, what are the best pictures to use for a dating profile? Here are a few tips, on the types of online dating photos women want to see displayed on your profile.
Recent photos. It is a good idea to only post pictures taken within the past 2 years. If something about your appearance has drastically changed within that period of time (i.e. weight, hairstyle or anything else), then only post up-to-date photos that portray your current look.
Clear images. Whenever possible, stick to using profile photos that are as clear as possible. Camera phone images sometimes lack clarity — make use of a digital camera, or have professional photos taken where you appear natural (and not posed). If you opt for professional photos, still include a few of your own candid shots that are not retouched.
A shot where you are smiling. Honestly, if none of your photos display your pearly whites to the world, women assume something is wrong with your teeth. Or they may just assume that you are generally not a happy guy. Although a toothy grin is not required in a profile photo, most online daters are looking for partners who appear fun and relaxed — at least opt for a pleasant facial expression.
One close-up picture and a full body snapshot. We all know that a certain level of physical attraction is important to both sexes. Naturally, you want to provide potential matches with a an accurate preview of how you will look, if or when they meet you in person. Always remember to post a headshot and a full body shot. The headshot or close-up really needs to be your best picture. It is the first thing people see within the search results, along with the masses of other photos — also known as “the competition.” If your profile lacks a full body picture, people may be inclined to assume you are masking your lower body for some reason. As expected, the full body snapshot is key in providing an accurate depiction of your body type, to potential matches viewing your profile.
A photo taken with your dog. Photos of a guy with “man’s best friend” on a beach, or even just hanging at home, both provide a great visual to a woman who is also a dog lover. For the man who actually has a dog, a photo of the two of you on your profile is a nice way to demonstrate a softer side — without going overboard. Keep it simple though.
A variety of images that portray your lifestyle. If you are keen on going hiking, snowboarding or even playing the guitar — women absolutely LOVE to see photos of men with strong passions. Post additional images that demonstrate various aspects of your everyday life, and your personal style in terms of clothing. If you wear a suit to work everyday, post a photo of how you look in your work attire. Balance this type of image, by displaying photos that portray other aspects of your life. We’re inclined to agree with the proverb — All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Aside from a shot where you are pursuing a physical activity or hobby — try to include a travel photo and a shot where you are with a small group of your friends (this type of photo indicates you are outgoing enough to have friends). Travel photos are a must, because women like to see images of men with a touch of wanderlust. If you’ve got a cool picture of a trip to Machu Picchu — post it. Maybe you have a group photo taken with your buddies before your best friend’s wedding in LA, or one from your last Mancation (minus any bottles of beer). As long as the photos are relatively recent, they all look great in an online dating profile. Why? These particular types of photos indicate to women that you lead an active lifestyle, and you know how to have fun.
Focus on making your profile better with photos that allow you to appear well-rounded. Don’t go overboard by displaying too many photos that fit within a specific “type” of activity. When a potential match sees numerous photos of you repeatedly engaging in the same pursuit, she may assume that it consumes your lifestyle, and that the two of you will not be compatible.
For the man who really wants to know what successful women are looking for in potential partners — it’s pretty easy.
Blue-collar, white-collar, short, tall — none of these elements are as important as what a man is passionate about in the context of his everyday life. Women find active, driven men with solid passions and hobbies to be very sexy. If your dating profile photos capture the real you living and loving life — women will be genuinely attracted to you for all the right reasons.