You like to have a good time, but you’re a pro quarterback and it’s less than a year since you spent extended time in rehab.

Solution? If you’re Johnny Manziel, allegedly you party in Vegas wearing a blonde wig, a fake mustache, glasses, and a hoodie while going by the name “Billy.”

Troubling as this is for Johnny Football—still only 23, the former Heisman winner seems determined to take a Lindsay Lohan-esque approach to life—he’s also carrying on the rich tradition of sports stars blending in with the common folk by assuming new identities and/or wearing ridiculous wigs. Witness these six other practitioners of poorly planned deceptions…

bobby valentine disguise
Mustachioed Stranger in the Mets Dugout (Bobby Valentine)
Some guys put on disguises to have fun, others just want to get back to work. Ejected from a 1999 game, New York Mets Manager Bobby Valentine leaves, only to be replaced by this guy who looks oddly familiar somehow.

andreGiant Machine (Andre the Giant)
Soon after the legendary Princess Bride star took a break from wrestling, who should appear but a masked man standing 7’4”, weighing at least 500 pounds, and speaking with a French accent? (In other news, Superman just might be Clark Kent.)


Homeless Spaniard (Cristiano Ronaldo)
Real Madrid striker CR7 is disguised for a commercial, but inadvertently gives his identity away through his sweet soccer skills and refusal to pass. (Seriously, share the ball with the damn kid!)

Unknown
Coach Janky Spanky, Dolemite Jenkins, Prime Minister Yah and oh so many more… (Clinton Portis)

Some folk use disguises to dodge attention: not the case here. No word on which alter ego the former All-Pro running back blames for his recent bankruptcy filing. (We suspect Southeast Jerome—he’s reckless, that one.)


“Howard” (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
The seven-time Mr. Olympia returns to the gym in a surprisingly funny clip that gets downright hilarious when you remember he shot this after being elected governor of our nation’s largest state twice.

michael vick ron mexicoRon Mexico (Michael Vick)
A Pro Bowl QB on game days, off the field he became Ron, a fun-loving possible carrier of herpes. (A 2006 settlement with a former sex partner denied us a definitive answer.) Well, at least Michael Vick had no other dark secrets. Wait…