Headphones can be loud in more senses than one. You can opt for those tiny, barely noticeable earbuds that make you look like you’re waiting on orders from the Secret Service. Or, you can get a pair of headphones with some character.
These are headphones that looks cool and sets you apart from the other drones with their plain old standard-equipped iPod ones. Skullcandy, aptly named, is giving you the opportunity to put something sweet on your cranium with their new Skullcandy Ti Headphones.
With eight different styles designed for the true individual, the headphones do not quietly slip into the crowd; particularly the White-Fur style, which look like they belong on a 1970’s pimp. And who doesn’t want to look like a 1970’s pimp? And it’s not just the look; all of Skullcandy’s headphones are beyond comfortable and sound great. Each pair goes for $79.95 and can be bought here.
Okay, so the primary use for this little contraption isn’t making some good old-fashioned moonshine (an ordinary bathtub will do for that), although the name may suggest otherwise. The Mississippi Distiller primarily extracts essential oils.
It gets them from plant leaves like lavender, mint, and thyme, turning them into a concentrated liquid. You could drink that if you really wanted to, but mostly they go into perfumes and air fresheners. However, you don’t have to tell your friends this. Which brings us to its other function: just looking really cool. You want this baby in your place, if only for the conversations it’ll start. Made in Barcelona by the Mississippi Destil Co., the Mississippi Distiller is an homage to the American South, better than any Jeff Foxworthy joke. With a walnut base, borosilicate “heat-resistant” glass pieces, and a frame made from five copper plates, the thing looks like H.G Wells’ juicer. And what’s stopping you from telling your guests that it is? And, hey, we bet if you put your mind to it, you could probably actually find a way to squeeze some rye whiskey out of it. The Mississippi Distiller costs $200 and can be found here.
Everybody needs a kick start to their day. But when you order a Venti Non-Fat Iced Green Tea Latte with One Pump of Sugar-Free Vanilla, you may feel like your masculinity is packing its things to go find someone else who will put it to better use.
Energy drinks, energy shots, and every kind of tea you can think of…it’s all lacking substance. It’s about time there be a manly way to get some energy. If only there was some smoked sweet and spicy dried meat that could give us real men a boost. That’s what the creators of Perky Jerky had in mind when they came up with the world’s first “all-natural performance enhancing meat snack.” Not sure which performances eating lots of jerky (caffeinated or not) will enhance but, hell, it’s about as manly as snacks get. Perky Jerky’s beef jerky is infused with Guarana, a natural energy booster with twice the caffeine of a coffee bean. So go ahead and drop this in your office’s suggestion box: lose the coffee break and add a jerky break. They’ll thank you later.
Gamers, you have a lot of gaming to do. You might as well break the key off in the lock of the door to your living room. Two games that are guaranteed to be some of this year’s biggest releases are out today: Brutal Legend and Uncharted 2: Among Thieves. Get comfy.
Brutal Legend, for both Playstation 3 and Xbox 360, is an action-adventure game like you’ve never seen. The game revolves around the character Eddie Rigs (voiced by Jack Black), a roadie who gets transported to another dimension, completely inspired by the album artwork of Heavy Metal bands. Eddie becomes a hero, leading humans against a plethora of terrifying overlords, using three weapons: a battle axe, his Flying V guitar capable of casting nasty spells, and his trusty Hot Rod. Uncharted 2: Among Thieves, a Playstation 3 exclusive, is already getting lumped with candidates for Game of the Year by critics. Sequel to Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune, the game is basically Tomb Raider without the hours wasted trying to get a great look at Lara Croft’s ass. The story revolves around another historical mystery: Marco Polo’s mysterious voyage from China takes center stage. Check it out on it’s official site, here.
Every week you joyfully watch him shovel food into his face on his Food Network show “Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives”. Now Guy Fieri provides you with more than just commentary on whatever ulcer-inducing dish he’s inhaling.
He’s designed two knives completely for the quintessential guy cook he calls Guy Fieri’s Knuckle-Sandwich Knives. The two knives (an 8” chef knife and a 5 ½” utility knife) are must-haves for any bad ass chef’s kitchen. Not a bad ass chef? Well, they might inspire you to cook something besides a microwaved plate of Tyson’s chicken nuggets. First, Guy did away with the plain old-fashioned black handles and threw some red and stars in there. The handles are ergonomically designed to fit your hand comfortably for serious slicing and dicing. Then, he added a tribal flame etched into the high-carbon stainless steel blade; turns out flames are douchey on a vehicle, but awesome on a knife. And as if these knives aren’t manly enough, on the end of the utility knife Guy added a meat tenderizer he dubbed “The Crusher”. Rachel Ray would faint at the site of these, and you can pre-order them now here.
You love bars. And what’s not to love? A bar has all of life‘s greatest things. Girls. Beer. Girls drunk on beer. Golden Tee. And those classy neon signs displaying every type of liquor that bar carries and whether they’re open or not.
Every self-respecting bar has one, and in a place of prominence. Who says these flashy pieces of decoration should be exclusive to bars? If you’re thinking one of these babies would totally tie your room together, you’re absolutely correct. And not only can you now own one for yourself, you can customize it to say anything you’d like. You have something to say that warrants being in cool neon blue on your wall, and with the Do It Yourself Neon Sign Kit, you can create your sign on the spot. Plug it in, and you’re done. With its low heat and low power consumption, the sign is ultra safe. So, good to know you won’t be burning down your place just so you can tell visitors you do in fact have “free beer.” The DIY Neon Sign Kit costs between $2.99 and $3.99, and can be found here.
Paranormal Activity is the new Blair Witch. It’s Blair Witch for people that say that Blair Witch “wasn’t scary enough” or people that say Blair Witch was “totally effing scary, but awesome.” Whatever you say, this is a legitimately nerve-racking flick.
But, you might not be able to see it. The film was extremely low budget – only $15,000 to shoot. And, similarly, didn’t have the scrilla for mass distribution or marketing. But, having taken all the things Blair Witch did wrong and doing them very, very right, audiences have responded positively. So, go to this site right here and vote. You enter your information, but it won’t be used to spam you, it will just count a vote toward your area of the country. Good luck.
There’s not many instances when a shelf gets to be anything other than a shelf. You put things on it and the shelf keeps them from being on the floor. And that’s pretty much it. End of story. This is boring.
Why settle for a plain old shelf? How about one that serves a few different purposes, while looking cool at the same time? The solution has come in the Digital Magnetic Shelf Clock, a shelf that has more uses than syllables in its name. The Digital Magnetic Shelf Clock attaches right to your wall. 12 centimeters high, 12 centimeters wide, and 90 centimeters long, the DMSC is small and frees up your room to give it an open feeling. And not only does it serve as place to put things on like CD’s, DVD’s, or books, it also clearly displays the time of day alongside a digital calendar, in case you somehow slept for months straight and weren’t aware how far into the year we were. The DMSC has you covered. And with a stainless steel front and wood sides, you’ll have the sweetest looking shelf in the neighborhood, guaranteed. The Digital Magnetic Shelf Clock is $158 and can be found here.
If the most exciting thing on your desk is a Post-it note reminding you to adjust your Fantasy Football team, you have a serious case of Lame-Desk. Millions are affected by Lame-Desk, but you don’t have to be.
Just imagine what kind of stuff Dr. Jones would have on his desk. A creepy gold fertility idol, an ark that melts peoples faces, the freakin’ Holy Grail… This beats the hell out of your Far Side calendar. And now all three of these can be yours – sized for your desktop and fully functional[sic]. The Fertility Idol that Indy used to barely escaped that huge ball of stone with is now conveniently a pen/pencil holder. And what are the odds somebody borrows a pen from that thing and DOESN’T return it to you? They wouldn’t dare risk it. Remember the Ark of the Covenant? Makes a great business card-holder. Last but not least, the Holy Grail acts as the coolest paperclip holder you will ever own. It’s not clear if this does, in fact, grant eternal life, but it’s definitely worth a shot. The Indiana Jones Desktop Accessories are priced from $34.99 to $39.99 and can be found here.
Are you worried you’re getting too much work done? It’s best not to chance it; stop what you‘re doing right away. Keep productivity to a minimum. Otherwise when you do slow down, people will see. It’s just not worth it.
So what to do in the mean time? Here’s something that should distract you for an unprecedented chunk of your day: Incredibox, the new human beatbox building website allows you to dive into your creative side and make your own unique beatbox. Just head to www.incredibox.fr/ (apparently the French are way ahead of us in beat boxing technology), and choose your language. Then go down the line of French-looking dudes, and drag the different elements into their shirts. Instruments, percussions, effects, chorus, voices; there are even three bonuses for some pretty sweet but out there breakdowns in the middle of your beatbox. The combinations are endless. Get a beat you like going and practice your freestyle. Next thing you know two whole days have gone by and you’re ready to really get a club going.
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