Well, almost nothing surprises these days, so we can’t say we are shocked over the latest bombshell from the New York Times, detailing Louis C.K.’s long history of allegedly masturbating or asking to masturbate in front of women. Sigh.

We really aren’t sure what is with Hollywood dudes and their seeming propensity to rub one off at inappropriate times but it does present us with an opportunity for a PSA. So here it is…

Attention all dudes: Your masturbation habits could be wreaking havoc on your sex life.

Doctors say male fetuses get erections in the womb and even touch themselves from time to time. So you got an early start and now you can’t stop. Well, we’re not saying you have to—but you may want to reconsider exactly how you’re getting yourself off.

Some masturbation routines that boys bring into their teens and 20s can ultimately lead to unrealistic expectations during partnered sex and, therefore, decreased satisfaction for both people involved. If you recognize any of these bad behaviors, we suggest you correct them stat.

1. You don’t switch it up.
If you do some weird hand thing when you’re jacking off, you’re going to want her to replicate it exactly and you’ll likely be frustrated when she struggles to do just that. You’ve also become so meticulous that sex in real life becomes a timed science. She doesn’t necessarily want you to go too fast, but taking too long to orgasm can be frustrating… and start to get boring.

Change up your moves so you train yourself to achieve orgasms through a number of different ways.

2. You have one goal in mind: finishing.
You’re a dude so let’s be honest, you’re ready to go 24/7. And, in masturbation, you don’t have anyone else to warm up. But sometimes it takes a little more time and *gasp!* effort to get a woman to the same level of excitement.

Don’t be so focused on dessert when you haven’t even enjoyed the appetizer. Foreplay first, always.

3. You watch too much porn.
Yes, there is a limit. Otherwise, you’ll start to make assumptions that your partner is some sort of sex goddess who can contort her body in absurd ways, too. Newsflash! She can’t. Maybe one percent of the population is as flexible as porn stars, so lower those expectations. Plus, she could definitely do without the jackhammering you’re used to seeing in porn.

Consider watching less porn or, at the very least, switching up what kind of porn you’re watching. This way you’ll be open to different sexual situations IRL.

Photo: Getty Images/Ben Gabbe/Stringer