10 Best ‘NCIS’ Quotes

The 10 best N.C.I.S. quotes are subjective, yes—subjectively funny! Here is a quick run down on characters from this hit television series. Gibbs is “the boss.” Dinozzo is the handsome senior officer. Ziva kick-ass Israelite liaison now turned probationary officer. McGee humble agent and there’s Ducky the coroner. Last but not least, punk rocker forensic specialist Abby.

  1. Gibb’s most famous line. “You think, Dinozzo?” Or add Ziva, McGee, Abby and Ducky at the end of that sentence. It’s a one-for-all quote for Gibbs on N.C.I.S.
  2. Ziva in-your-face. “I will kill you eighteen different ways with this paper clip.” We’d advise you take two steps back, let’s not upset her.
  3. Abby’s threat. “I am one of the few people in the world who can murder you and leave no forensic evidence.”  That’s not a threat, that’s a statement of fact.
  4. Ducky’s profound statement. “If we focused less on our differences and more on learning from each other, perhaps that would mean the end of wars.” Amen to that, Ducky. If only the world leaders were given this quote from N.C.I.S., maybe it might strike a chord of peace.
  5. McGee on the peaking order of things. “What are you doing? I’m not the sidekick.” We hate to tell you McGee, but you are the sidekick.
  6. Gibb on red tape. “Politicians have their time table, I have mine.” Sounds like a true military man to us.
  7. Ziva’s feelings on touching. “Remove your hand or I’ll rip your arm off and beat you with it.” Jury’s still out if she has hostility issues.
  8. Abby’s endurance. “I am the Energizer bunny of forensic science: I never sleep and I never give up.” That’s why she’s Gibb’s favorite and a fan favorite of the the television series N.C.I.S. 
  9. Ziva on cooking. “You know what they say, you cannot make an omelet without breaking a few legs.” She’s a foreigner, maybe they cook eggs different where she’s from.
  10. Gibb’s clarity. “We’re not F.B.I., dirtbag.” He could not have said it better.


N.C.I.S. stands for Naval Crime Investigation Service. Sounds serious and drab but the characters on the hit television series with their witty banter, pure serious fun. Nothing drab there, Dinozzo.

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