10 Clever Facebook Statuses

These 10 clever Facebook statuses will make you stand out from all the rest of your friends on Facebook, adding a funny nugget to the endless news feed on the Facebook homepage. This may encourage more comments, likes and general attention to your particular profile and to you as a virtual person, if that sort of thing is really important to you. Posting enough clever statuses may even qualify you for having your own Twitter account, where you'll able to tell everyone everything you are thinking.

1. "I've lost my Teddy Bear, will you sleep with me?" is a good one, as it's witty and there's a chance it might work.
2. "Light travels faster then sound. That's why some people seem bright when you hear them speak." This is just pure Facebook wisdom, unless that's an oxymoron.
3. "Have you noticed the lol symbol looks like a drowning guy? I bet he's not laughing outloud." Funny and possibly true. Frightening that we're now analyzing our acronyms.
4. "Likes to think one step ahead. Like a carpenter. Building stairs." Good one.
5. "A middle class American who's psychologically stable, except when my team loses." A play on the word status, but effective nonetheless.
6. "Dance like no one is going to put it on YouTube." Good comment on our technical world and a play on another saying.
7. "So many stupid people and so few asteroids." Hilarious and true.
8. "Teaching your own mother to use Facebook is willingly signing your own death warrant." Someone needs to get out of the house more. And unfriend his mother.
9. "The kid next door's imaginary friend." Philosophical and awesome. 
10. "Insert coin to view my status message." If only this could be done...