10 Funny Cowboy Quotes From Movies

Finding 10 funny cowboy quotes provided a nostalgic look back at the western movies that we of the older generation saw at the theater most Saturdays in our youth. Many of those movies are still available for the new generation to see and enjoy, and many of the quotes are still known today.

  1.  "Beans, beans, the musical fruit!" is from "Blazing Saddles" in 1974 (a Mel Brooks movie). "Blazing Saddles" is a classic guy movie with dumb gags one after the other. 
  2. "You gonna do something or just stand there and bleed?" (Wyatt Earp). In "Tombstone", Kurt Russell played Wyatt and Val Kilmer played Doc Holliday. These two characters are called kings of one liners. 
  3. "A fiery horse with the speed of light, a cloud of dust, and a hearty "Hi-yo Silver." From the 1949 movie "Lone Ranger", it's also at the beginning of every TV show. Remember the silver bullet and Tonto, which are two more regular Lone Ranger symbols. 
  4. "I was born a cowboy, have lived as a cowboy, and will die a cowboy" (Tom Mix). Tom was the star of 336 early Westerns, and only nine were not silent. 
  5. "You do and it'll be the biggest mistake you ever made, you Texas brushpopper" (John Wayne in "True Grit", a 1969 western).  John Wayne's headstone, in part, reflects his philosophy with "(Tomorrow) hopes we've learnt something from yesterday".
  6. "Talk low, talk slow, and don't say too much".  Another popular quote of Wayne's which was an acting tip from Wayne to fellow actor Michael Caine.
  7. "Rollin' on the river" is what Roy Rogers said he and Trigger were doing in "The Yellow Rose of Texas" when they joined a showboat crew.  A news release said that the Roy Rogers Museum has been closed permanently and the contents are being auctioned off. So sad. 
  8. "Say, you're not as dumb as you look!" (Gene Autry in "Gene Autry and The Mounties", 1951).   Gene Autry, as well as starring in 95 movies, had a radio program for years, and starred in and produced his own television show. 
  9. "An outlaw calls a man out for tampering with his horseonly to find out there's nary a pistol in town. You can't have a showdown with an unarmed man" (Paul Gross playing an outlaw in the Wild West movie "Gunless").  In exchange for helping a local woman, she lets him fix up an old pistol to prepare for a showdown.
  10. "I said I never had much use for one.  Never said I didn't know how to use it"  (Tom Selleck concerning Colt revolvers in "Quigley Down Under", a 1990 western).  As an interesting note, after being inducted into Oklahoma's National Cowboy & Western Heritage Museum,. Tom said that honor meant even more to him than the Emmy and Golden Globe that he previously won.
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