When it's time to pop the question there are 10 questions to ask yourself before you get married. Making the mistake of marrying the wrong woman can lead to a lifetime of despair, yet not marrying the woman who is your soul mate can result in a lifetime of "what ifs". Before you get married, asking yourself key questions about your future spouse, her family, and–most of all–your motives will help to put you on the correct path towards or away from the altar.
- Can I live with her bad habits? She's messy to a fault, laughs like a banshee, spends money like it's 2012 and you've just brought her an engagement ring. If you can't stand her bad habits now, they won't disappear after you've married. Decide if you can live with them, and, if not, it may be a good thing to hold off on that ring.
- Can I compromise? Marriage equals compromise. As a single guy, you've grown accustomed to doing what you please when you please. Bring a wife into the picture and you'll need to adjust. You may even have to give up on some of the habits that you've developed over the years. Just keep in mind that compromise doesn't mean total capitulation; expect compromises from her as well.
- Can I stand her family? The saying “daddy's little girl” didn't come from nowhere. If your intended is that little girl you'd better be able to get along with daddy. A family that disapproves or otherwise dislikes you can put unimaginable strain on any marriage and you'll want to be sure that you are up to the task.
- Am I ready for a family? Don't automatically assume that you know her opinion on the subject of children. Have you discussed children, and do you agree? If you haven't or don't, then you will want to settle the issue before you get married.
- Does she hinder my goals? Many guys have a plan about where they see themselves and how they plan to get there. An important question to ask yourself is how she fares in those plans and if she is the type of woman who will boost you forward or hinder your way.
- Can I commit to one woman? It has to be high on the list of questions to ask yourself before you get married. Even if you don't believe in the idea of monogamy, chances are she does. That means making a commitment to stay faithful and give up on other women. If more than your eye has roved during your relationship, then you should be honest before someone gets hurt.
- Is it lust or love? Is there an old flame that holds a piece of your heart? Is your relationship about sex, sex and more sex, but when it comes to knowing what makes her so special as a person you come up blank? If you hesitate when asking yourself if you love her, then you made need to hesitate before getting down on bended knee.
- Are our financial goals the same? Your financial future is important. If you don't agree on what your financial goals are, there could be stormy weather ahead. If she is a penny pincher but you love to buy whatever your heart desires, you'll want to consider this before you get married.
- Can I live without her? You've asked yourself eight out of ten questions and decided that she's messy beyond all tolerance, you can't stand her condescending relatives and she wants a baby yesterday. Before you toss the engagement ring, ask yourself if–despite all of those things that seemingly bode ill for your future marital bliss–could you really live without her? If that idea makes you break out in a sweat, take a deep breath and ask yourself…
- Am I ready? Last but not least, this is the most important of all the questions to ask yourself before you get married. If you aren't ready to have a wife and all the good, bad and in between that marriage entails, all the other questions don't mean a thing.
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