10 Tips For Talking To Teens About Sex
If you’ve got an angsty, budding teen on your hands, you might find these 10 tips for talking to teens about sex very useful. Teenagers are difficult beings to understand and communicate with, but it’s important that you still be 100 percent there for them. Talking about sex is completely necessary if you’ve got soon-to-be young adults on your hands and doing it as soon as possible is imperative.
- Start your conversation off with asking your teen what he/she knows about sex. Making sure that your teen knows the basics is key here. If it turns out that your teen isn’t familiar with sex in the least, this is the perfect time to explain these types of things.
- Discuss all of the consequences of sex. All of the consequences should include pregnancy, STDs, changed behavior of the partner after intercourse, etc. There are many possible outcomes of sexual activity and it’s important that your teen is familiar with all of them.
- Tell your teen that you’re always open to talk. This is probably one of the best tips for talking to teens about sex. Don’t simply sit down with your teen for five minutes, spill out the basics of sex and then sigh in relief that the conversation is over. Tell your teen that you’re open to talking about sex at any time.
- Talk about dealing with sexuality. Of course, it’s well-known that sexuality is normal at a teen’s age, but this certainly does not mean that beginning to have sex is okay. Furthermore, explain why sex is not okay at his/her age (the law, pregnancy, lack of knowledge about the real world, etc).
- Just because you’re talking to teens about sex doesn’t mean that they’re going to automatically abstain. Teens will do what they want to do and they might even go off and have sex the night of the talk. This is why it’s so vital to stress the importance of protection, including birth control.
- Explain to your teen that lust is normal at his/her age. You probably remember what love was like at the tender age of sixteen. Teens are emotional beings and it’s completely natural to fall head over heels for another person. Assure them that their feelings are normal, but also encourage them not to get too wrapped up into their emotions. For example, teenage girls might feel that sex is automatically okay if her male partner let's her know that he loves her. Use this as an example and explain that this is an instance of getting too wrapped up in emotions.
- Try not to be judgmental. Since you’ll already be talking to teens about sex, they might actually come out and admit some sexual things that they’ve done. Refrain from getting upset and critical and become more of an outlet.
- Encourage your child to ask questions. It’s important that you not keep things simple and try to end the conversation as soon as possible to relieve the tension. Tell your teen that you’re open to answering questions if he/she has any.
- Try to hit on the topic of rape during your conversation. This is a very important component of talking to teens about sex and it’s important for all teens to get a quick overview of what it’s about. Tell your son that “No” means “No” and continuing sexual activity is technically considered rape. If you’ve got a daughter, tell her about the dangers of rape and how it can come about. Talk to her about date rape drugs, parties and other aspects of this subject.
- Lastly, inform your teens about “sexting.” Sexting is a play on the word texting and it basically means sending dirty pictures or texts back and forth through text messages. It’s completely unacceptable and the consequences could be harsh. Let them know that all it would take is forwarding the pictures to several people to cause severe emotional abuse to the person in the pictures. Always remember that using these tips for talking to teens about sex may be awkward, but you are doing your child an immense favor in the long run.