10 Ways To Save A Relationship
If your relationship is struggling, you may need these 10 ways to save a relationship. Even good relationships can turn sour and sometimes it's better to part ways. If you're willing to take the time to make it work, however, here are some ways to save your relationship.
- Figure out the problem. Talk to your partner about your relationship and what has gone wrong. You may be tempted to talk to a friend or a counselor by yourself, but remember that you can't save a relationship if you can't both communicate the problems.
- Find the right time and place. Don't try to work out your relationship issues if you're in public or in the middle of something important. External problems will only distract you and your partner from the real issues. Instead, find a private place and time to talk through your problems.
- Point things out when they come up. If you try to ignore the problems in your relationship until they become too much to bear, your partner may not even know that something's wrong. Point out problems when they come up and work to solve them before they get out of control.
- Stop trying to win. Discussions with your partner shouldn't be about winning and losing; they should be about understanding each other and reaching a compromise. Instead of keeping score, pay attention to what your partner has to say and learn from it.
- Don't be accusatory. If you're upset that your partner doesn't help out around the house, for example, don't say, "You never help." Your partner will just latch on to that to contradict your statement. Instead, talk about what the issue means to you and work out a way to divide the work.
- Be careful when you get angry. It's okay to be angry with your partner as long as you express that anger in productive ways. Yelling and name calling are verbally abusive and won't do a thing to save your relationship. If you're having a hard time with your anger, take a break to calm down before talking to your partner about it.
- Take one thing at a time. Your relationship may have many overlapping problems and working to save the relationship may feel overwhelming. Focusing on one thing at a time rather than paying attention to what isn't fixed will help you make progress and have a more successful relationship.
- Talk to a relationship counselor. Sometimes it helps to get an outside view on your relationship problems. A relationship counselor can help you save a relationship by mediating discussions and offering advice.
- Be willing to apologize. You can't save a relationship if you're not willing to own your mistakes. If you hurt your partner, you can't truly move on until you apologize and mean it. The same goes if your partner hurt you.
- Remember that it takes two. That doesn't mean you and your partner are equally responsible for the problems in the relationship, as some advice-givers might tell you. It does mean, however, that you can only save the relationship if both of you put in the effort. You can't save a relationship if one partner isn't interested in saving it.