Anyone that puts time and effort into something creative deserves credit for making the attempt—even if that attempt turns out to be one of the ten worst rock albums of all time. And, if it's a sonic abortion that you wouldn't wish on the ears of your worst enemy, for better or for worse, something needs to be said. These are the 10 worst Rock albums of all time.
- "Wicked Wonderland" – Lita Ford: It's bad enough that this album sounds like it was recorded in a cardboard box, but the constant S&M overtones between Ford and husband Jim Gillette send the worst kind of chills up our spine.
- "Greatest Hits" – Chris Gaines (Garth Brooks): If you are the biggest name in country music, sell albums by the boatload, and are the biggest concert draw in the world, what do you do next? You push it all to the side, strap on a wig, and try to perform lame rock songs as a dead fictional character, of course! That's exactly what Garth Brooks did in 1999 with this pile of digital dung. When is Prince putting out his speed metal album?
- "Van Halen III" – Van Halen: With the unceremonious exit of Sammy Hagar complete, Eddie and Alex went out and tapped Gary Cherone from Extreme for his Sammy-like vocals. It's uncertain what happened after that but it seems like they said "Welcome to the band, Gary. Here's a bunch of half-assed ideas that have no hooks. Track some vocals and let us know when you are done."
- "Rock Star Supernova" – Rock Star Supernova: Sitting in front of the tube week after week watching these rock legends (and Gilby Clarke) working their way through bad karaoke auditions until they found the right singer with that "it" factor should have produced a bigger payoff than a luck troll with bad vocal chords. The fact that Jason Newsted faked an injury to get out of playing with this nutless musical abomination speaks volumes.
- "Attila" – Attila: Billy Joel may be world renowned as The Piano Man who sings upbeat feel good songs about Christie Brinkley while drunk driving his car into houses. But before all of that, he was a member of Attila, one of the most ghastly sounding bands the planet has ever heard. The auditory carnage is captured for all time on their one and only album, released in 1970. You may hate "Uptown Girl" but it sounds like Chopin when compared to this dreck.
- "Scream" – Chris Cornell: As bad as Billy Joel was with Attila, at least that was the beginning of his musical career. Cornell deciding to bust a rhyme with Timbaland can't be excused due to the fact that he was already an established grunge legend when he decided to unleash this sonic torture device on society.
- "One for All" – Peter Criss: A producer would have never allowed this record to go past demo stage. The limp arrangements, muddy mixing, and average guitar playing are bad enough but they are completely surpassed by Criss' totally out of key vocals. How he heard the mix of this album in the studio and said "That's it, we're done" we'll never know.
- "This Left Feels Right" – Bon Jovi: You know you've run out of ideas when the best thing you can think of is to reorganize all of your previous hits and make them sound like unrecognizable crap that was recorded after a Valium binge.
- "Music From The Elder" – KISS: By 1981, the hottest band in the world was in the midst of a personality crisis. After a weird venture into disco land, they decided they would try to write an epic concept record about a boy and his potential to save the universe. Hey Gene, we want to hear you sing about groupies, not about the triumphs of good over evil!
- "St. Anger" – Metallica: No 'worst rock album' list would be complete without this album. From the detuned attempts at sounding current to Lars' trash-can lid drum set to James' cracking vocals, this album has everything needed to make a die-hard Metallica fan feel as though he's been castrated by his favorite band.
What Others Are Reading Right Now.
Acting, comedy and strong spirits converge in Speakeasy. When host Paul F. Tompkins interviews entertainers—Key and Peele, Alison Brie, Rob Delaney, Zach Galifianakis—about all sor …
10 Things Women Expect Men to Know How To Do
To make ladies swoon or at least not cringe, you’d better be able to handle the following…
Speakeasy: Jonathan Banks
The Emmy-nominated Breaking Bad star talks Beverly Hills Cop, Wiseguy, sitcom work and his new flick with Danny Trejo, Bullet. Oh yeah, a few Mike Ehrma …