5 Best Dexter Morgan Quotes 2009

These five best Dexter Morgan quotes from 2009 are some of the funniest, quirkiest, and most interesting things from the popular Showtime show Dexter. From murder to barbecue, these Dexter Morgan quotes from 2009-seasons three and four-are sure to please.

  1. Dexter discusses his barbecue. "The backyard barbecue, it's a holdover from the last Ice Age when food was scarce and men had to work together to take down a large beast. Those who worked well with others survived and their genes have been passed down through the centuries until they landed here, in this, my community." Dexter being philosophical is one of the best parts of his character; he turns everything into a metaphor for the human condition, and even with ridiculous objects-like a barbecue-it always works perfectly.
  2. Dexter gets annoyed with his victim. Zoey: "You gonna rape and kill me?" Dexter: "What is it with you and rape? No one's raping anyone. Killing on the other hand…" Another one of the best things about Dexter is his humor. He gets so fed up and annoyed with people being stupid, and making fun of his victims before killing them is always hilarious.
  3. Dexter waxes poetic about sailing. "Man has always been drawn to the sea, but it's an unnatural setting for us, a place of great danger. Tides, currents, waves, wind each presenting their own hazards, none of which can be ignored. The slightest lapse of judgment can be a mistake you might never recover from. But a good sailor doesn't fight against these elements. A good sailor works with them, using them to his advantage. While others less fortunate might be forever cast adrift often in several pieces. He always comes home safely." Again, Dexter uses this gorgeous metaphor in his internal monologue, all just about sailing representing his own life.
  4. Dexter lies about his secrets. "See? I have nothing to hide." Thinking: "Except for the syringes, scalpels, and bone saw hidden in that secret drawer underneath. " Again, Dexter's humor is what makes this line great. Dexter is masterful with lying, and his ironic voice-over always makes the situation hilarious. 
  5. Dexter misses single life. Thinking: "It's a very well organized crime scene. The assailant took his time, cleaned up after himself. He obviously doesn't have kids." Dexter prided himself in the cleanliness of his work, but after having a child, he has become rushed and tired. Hearing him pine for the good old days of murder like most men pine for the good old days of various women just adds to the ironic nature of his character, which is one of the things that makes Dexter such a well-written character.
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