5 Best ‘Zoolander’ Movie Quotes

If you like silly comedies, then "Zoolander" is for you; and if you like hilarious movie quotes, then you'll love the 5 best "Zoolander" movie quotes.  Starring Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson as Derek Zoolander and Hansel (respectively).  Zoolander feels he is at the end of his career when Hansel breaks his streak of three consecutive Model of the Year awards.  Just when Zoolander thinks he is turning his career around, he finds out he's being brainwashed to kill the Prime Minister of Malaysia. Yah, we're not kidding. With such a hilarious premise, it was hard to pick only five hilarious "Zoolander" movie quotes, but we always love a challenge. 

  1. "What is this? A center for ants? How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read… if they can't even fit inside the building?….I don't wanna hear your excuses! The building has to be at least… three times bigger than this."  Mugatu (Will Ferrell) brainwashes Zoolander, under the guise of saving his career, decides to make a Center for Children. Zoolander sees a model of this Center for Children and lets out this classic movie quote. 
  2. "Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think… If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident."  After losing his friends to a freak accident, Derek speaks from his well-chiseled heart. Watching a model wax philosophical on any issue is hilarious. And when that model is Ben Stiller, it's doubly entertaining.
  3. "How? With your male modeling? Prancing around in your underwear with your wiener hanging out for everyone to see?" Larry, Zoolander's dad, replies to him after he says he just wants Larry to be proud of him. Derek tried to impress his family by coming home, working with them in the mines, and finding his roots, but he ends up making them more ashamed of him.
  4. "Orange Mocha Frappuccino!"  It all begins when Derek is feeling down in his apartment with his three friends and they are trying to cheer him up.  And, they know the perfect way, an Orange Mocha Frappuccino!  After that, there is a scene of them driving around while drinking Orange Mocha Frappuccinos and rocking out to Wham.
  5. "I can Dere-lick my own balls, thank you very much."  A "Zoolander" quote that is always incredibly funny is when Hansel hits Derek with the hilarious line, "I guess you can dere-lick my balls cap-E-tan" Derek responds with this equally as funny line.  After, they decide to have a walk-off, which gets called by the rock god David Bowie.
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