Dating is a process that we all must learn to navigate, and it is important to understand the most common 5 first date mistakes so you can avoid them. Dating takes patience. The more you know about what to do and not do on a first date, the more you will get out of the experience.
- Bring your manners to the date. Relationships are built on mutual trust and respect so you might as well begin by showing respect from the first date. Open her door, pull out her chair and include her in the decision regarding what to do and where to go on the date. Dress nicely. No old torn baseball tee shirts and a backwards cap. Eyes that roam around the room while your date is speaking to you send a loud message that you are bored, disinterested or already looking around for someone better. This could be considered one of the worst and most common mistakes made on a first date.
- Don’t let your nerves get the best of you. Nervousness can cause an over consumption of alcohol, a big first date mistake. No one wants to babysit a drunken semi-stranger on a first date. It can lead to poor behavior and choices. Take a deep breath and just be you. Don’t talk about your health issues, trouble with the law or past mistakes. Put your best foot forward without playing a character.
- Leave your ex at home. Any male over the age of 12 has a girl-related horror story. Your first date is not the place to discuss ex-girlfriends, ex-wives, broken hearts and your level of bitterness towards women in general. It shows a certain level of emotional unavailability. Focus on your date and getting to know her and not the relationship mistakes from your past.
- Easy does it. You don’t need to learn everything about your date over the first date dinner. Interrogating your date can lead to uncomfortable conversation. This is not a job interview. Your goal should be to open the lines of communication and discover common or mutual interests or attitudes. You might not want to jump into your political beliefs on the first night. It could become a huge first date mistake.
- Turn off the cell phone or turn off your date. There is nothing you can do that is more rude and disrespectful than to answer your cell phone or to text during your first. The exception would be a personal or work emergency or checking with your babysitter.
- Don’t be a first date caveman. Did you ask for this date because you are looking for a little one night fun or are you looking for a relationship? A caveman trying to drag her into the nearest cave by the hair is not the reason she accepted your invitation. A quality woman interested in a relationship will be turned off by unwanted advances, and you won’t be able to get her on the phone the next day, or ever again.
Browne, Joy, "Dating For Dummies." Wiley Publishing, 2006
Berkowitz, Bob and Gittines, Roger, "What Men Won't Tell You but Women Need to Know." Harper, 2008