How do you apologize to your mother-in-law? It's not easy, but when you marry somebody, you marry the entire family. It may say "forsaking all others" in the marriage vows, but you don't want to cross your mother-in-law. What do you do if you couldn't take it any more, and you found yourself yelling at or insulting your mother-in-law? Put a smile on your face, swallow your pride, and remember she is a human being with feelings just like yours.
- It's important that you apologize to your mother-in-law as soon as possible and in person. Call her and ask when it would be a good time to drop by and talk. If she is hostile and wants to know what you're up to, be frank and say you realize you owe her an apology and you'd like to make it in person. She will probably be glad to have the chance to mend fences.
- When you go to apologize to your mother-in-law, it would be a great idea to take a peace offering. Some flowers or a card will go a long way towards melting the hardest heart. If you've had other arguments in the past, she might be wary of the new you, so you are going to have to work hard to regain her trust.
- Most mother-in-laws are eager, at some point, to have their children settle down and get married, after all, the prize at the end is wonderful. Grandchildren. However, she didn't get a say about the type of person who became an important part of her family, so cut her a break. This is not the time to rehash differences. Simply say you are sorry. Hopefully, she will accept your apology, and she might even return the apology.
- Give her a hug. This gesture will go a long way when you apologize to your mother-in-law. In other words, take the high road, not just at this moment, but as often as you can. That way, if she dares to nag or complain, she looks like the bad guy. It's a win-win situation. Remember. You don't have to like your mother-in-law, although that would be great, you just need to be kind. That's not hard. Think of it as building good Karma. It takes a big person to apologize to your mother-in-law, but it will be worth it.
That said, it would be great if you never had to apologize to your mother-in-law at all. Dr. Glenn O. Johnson of the Department of Family and Human Development at Utah State University, offers the following guidelines so an apology to your mother in law won't be required. First, you should seek approval for the marriage from both sets of parents. Next, address your new mother-in-law with affectionate titles. You should also resolve to make your own decisions. Dr. Johnson cautions, "You will not be able to change your in-laws so try to learn to love them as they are." Don't tell any mother-in-law jokes, or you will find yourself having to apologize to your mother-in-law all over again.