How To Ask A Shy Girl Out

By: Natalie Murillo

Break Studios Contributing Writer

Sensitivity and low-pressure approaches are important factors to keep in mind when deciding how to ask a shy girl out. Several techniques can help you successfully get a shy girl to go out with you.

Keep it low-key. To ask a shy girl out, realize that she may not be completely comfortable with the idea of a one-on-one date, especially if she doesn't know you well. Instead, invite her out with a group of people, making sure to include people she knows as part of the group to increase her comfort level. Going to the movies or doing an activity, such as bowling, would be appropriate group activities to invite her to. Once she gets to know you better during the group date, she'll likely be more comfortable with the idea of going on a one-on-one date with you.
Ease into it. Instead of cutting to the chase and asking her on a date right off the bat, engage a shy girl in conversation for a while to break the ice and put her at ease. Ask her about topics you believe she might be interested in and get her to open up to you. Once you believe that she's grown more comfortable with you, it's a more appropriate time to ask her on a date.
Try an alternative approach. A different method from the traditional in-person or over-the-phone approach may be a more effective approach to ask a shy girl out. If you know her email address, try sending her an email inquiring if she might like to go out with you sometime. This way, you won't catch her off guard and it will give her time to think about it and respond in her own time and in her own way.
Leave the door open. If you ask a shy girl out and she isn't immediately agreeable to the idea, leave the door open for the possibility of going on a date in the future by letting her know that she's always welcome to get in touch with you if she changes her mind. A shy girl may initially feel put on the spot or caught off guard when she's asked out and therefore may not respond positively. Given more time to think about it, she may reconsider, so it would be helpful in this situation for her to know that your invitation for a date still stands.