Finding confidence within yourself is the key in learning how to avoid jealous girlfriends. This isn't as counterintuitive as it seems. Confidence is the antidote to jealousy. Cultivating it within yourself will attract it in others, and the girlfriends you'll have will be self-assured and rarely jealous.
- Find the jealousy within you. Is the jealousy you're dealing with coming from someone else or is it a reflection of what's happening inside of you? Think about what makes you jealous. Write it down. It might be when a girl flirts with someone in front of you, when she retains a friendship with an ex, or when she talks about ex-lovers. For each one of those points, write down what responsibility you have in that feeling of jealousy. She isn't making you feel jealous, so where does it come from? Did a girlfriend cheat on you in the past? Are you worried that if your girlfriend checks out another guy, she'll like him better? Finding the jealous tendencies within yourself will help you heal those things and stop attracting others with the same traits. They will also help you feel compassion for your girlfriend if she has jealousy issues.
- Find your well of confidence. This is not something that will happen overnight, especially if you have been dealing with your own jealousy for a long time. Slowly build up a set of experiences that will reinforce confidence within yourself. Do what you're good at and surround yourself with people who applaud you for doing those things and for being yourself. Take risks. When you succeed, it will build confidence that you can do it again. When you fail, you'll have that much more confidence when you succeed again.
- Look for confidence in others. Other than becoming a confident person yourself, the key to avoiding jealous girlfriends is to know what to look for in a girlfriend. Look for someone with a good sense of humor. People who can laugh at themselves and notice the humor in the world are likely to have inner confidence. Look for a girl who seems to like herself. This will probably be someone who dresses and acts like an individual. Seek out girls who know who they are.
- Communicate. When you have a girlfriend, talk with her about jealousy issues that have come up in the past. Each relationship is different, and both people in that relationship have the right to their own desires. If you want the relationship to remain non-exclusive, tell her about it. This gives you a chance to see her reaction early on. If you can't come to a compromise, the relationship may not be a good fit, anyway. Talk about what makes you feel insecure and jealous, and she'll feel free to tell you about her insecurities, as well. Sometimes, once these issues are aired, they cease to be issues at all.
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