How To Avoid Verbally Abusive Relationships
How to avoid verbally abusive relationships is not entirely possible as most people put on their best act in the beginning of a relationship. There are a few signs to observe and become aware before falling deep for the other person before it’s too late.
- Detect minor signs. To avoid verbally abusive relationships, observe things that may be a red flag. Perhaps she fell too much for you only after a few meetings and is already planning marriage and kids. While it's ok to be delighted that you have a special affect on someone, take a step back and look at things from a realistic perspective. If she seems too good to be true, chances are she is and this could be a sign of controlling behavior.
- Learn about their family background. Not everyone becomes verbally abusive from a bad history with their family, but most abusers usually do come from dysfunctional families where they witness one or both parents verbally abuse each other. When we get to know someone, we are curious about their family as they are extension of themselves, so if she is talking about her negative experiences of being verbally abused, she might also be verbally abusive. Hurt people hurt others so carefully observe the woman you are with and see if she exhibits any early signs of verbal abuse.
- Pay attention to their behavior. As mentioned in step one, the relationship could be too perfect so look for hidden clues of a verbally abusive relationship. Is everything you do is not good enough? Does she jokingly or seriously insults you and seem to rip you apart more than making you feel special? Does she even apologize every time she says something wrong because she feels guilty? When you constantly forgive all the negative things said about you, it gives her more power to assert her verbally abusive behavior over time.
- Know your likes and dislikes. Relationships are a gamble because we take a chance on others, but it is smart to establish standards that you want in a partner. Realizing that you will not tolerate verbal abuse saves you from extreme heartache, mentally and emotionally, later in the relationship as you set boundaries for what a person can or cannot do.