So you just went shopping and now you want to know hot to button a two button suit. You don't want to look like a fashion depraved moron, so it's very good that you decided to check before making a button blunder. Believe it or not, it isn't as easy as you might think. The whole "insert buttons into holes" strategy falls painfully short in this situation. In fact, you're far better off not buttoning your suit than you are buttoning all willy nilly like mad!
To button a two button suit, you will need:
- Two button suit
- Enough dexterity to insert a button through a hole
Keep in mind that you don't need enough dexterity to insert two buttons through two holes! Don't get too excited — here, thoughtful deliberation is key. Fitfully fastening your new clothing could cause great problems!
- The Top Button Take the top button and insert it into the top buttonhole. Give the garment a light tug to ensure a solid connection has been made between button and buttonhole, and that it won't pop off from normal use.
- The Bottom Button Control yourself! Do not button this button! Whatever you do, no matter what the circumstances, do not allow this button to enter the buttonhole! Seriously, it's a fashion faux pas. Don't do it.
- Final Effect You should have the top button buttoned and the bottom button unbuttoned. If you must, keep both buttons unbuttoned, but try to keep the top button buttoned while standing, and unbuttoned while sitting. Whatever you do, do not button only the bottom button, and for goodness' sake don't put the top button in the bottom button hole, or vice versa. Your friends will stop inviting you places.
- The Bottom Button Rule No matter what, whether you have a two button suit or a three button suit, your bottom button should never be closed. It's decoration. Just as you shouldn't eat the plastic fruit display on the bureau, you shouldn't button your bottom button.
The more you know, the more you can look like a competent member of society.