How to Crash a Party

If it's a party night, but you've got no party of your own, you need to know how to crash a party. First of all, don't call it crashing. You're not crashing anything, you're simply joining in the festivities. It is very easy to crash a party when you know the proper steps. If you follow this simple guide, you won't just crash a party, you may make some new friends and have a great time.

  1. Be patient. Never, ever try to crash a party in its initial stages. Get there around eleven or twelve, when you know there will be more people and they will be intoxicated and, consequently, feeling friendlier.
  2. Bring your own drinks. The fastest way to piss people off is to come to a party uninvited and race to the fridge. It's also the fastest way to get noticed at an exclusive party. Bring a water bottle of vodka or stuff a few beers into your pockets. That way, you can slowly make the rounds at the party and, by the time you do go for the fridge people will feel comfortable around you.
  3. Bring money. It's always advisable to have a few dollar bills handy. It's sometimes the only way to get out of a sticky situation. Bring five one dollar bills. That way, you can try to pay drink-for-drink, instead of getting ripped off by paying a five. If you want to instantaneously be accepted, enter the party, ask who the host is, and slap some bills into his hand.
  4. Make friends immediately. Look for someone who seems friendly and turn on the charm. To crash a party, you need to join the party. It's a good idea to try and find someone who's pretty drunk and open to meeting new people. Once you know the person and someone asks who you came here with, you can just drop that name.
  5. Blend in. Don't be that guy who shouts and runs around trying to be the center of attention. You're not the host, so you have to be gracious, respectful, and mild-mannered. Gravitate towards the larger groups at first, and try to enter the party when you see one of the groups going into the party.

The key to crashing a party is to respect the host and the party's natives. Don't do anything that might upset anybody. You want to stay at the party, not get kicked out. Too many people try to crash parties without paying attention to the other people at the party. This might be easier at first, but it will make it much harder to make friends, meet girls, and get drinks. And if you don't get to do any of those things, what was the point of crashing the party in the first place?  

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