Knowing how to deal with bad sexual experiences can help you put bad event behind you and move forward with confidence. Perhaps you failed to perform well, perhaps you and your partner didn’t click, or perhaps something traumatic happened. Regardless, being able to rebound using a few tips and put the past behind you will help you move on to your next conquest.
- Talk about it with your partner. If this bad sexual experience happened with your regular partner, hopefully it is a one-time thing and something that won’t happen again. Even Babe Ruth struck out on occasion. If so, talk about with your partner: discuss what happened, why you felt it was a bad experience, how you contributed to it, and how you both can keep it from happening in the future. Though you might feel uncomfortable talking about it, keeping good communication going is important to a healthy sex life.
- Talk to a female friend. Females have a perspective on sexual experiences that guys lack, and vice-versa. If you have a bad sexual experience, find a good female friend who you can talk to about sex, and share your thoughts with her. See what her input is on it and help her help you figure out what the issues are. If she’s a good enough friend and you’re primarily at fault, she’ll tell you.
- Talk to a male friend. Okay, the male friend is perhaps going to tell you stuff you already know, but sometimes it’s good just to have a sounding board off of which you can bounce some thoughts. Find a buddy who you know has a decent sex life and don’t be shy about opening up. Get his take on things and if the bad sexual experience was the fault of your female partner, he’ll either point this out or just confirm your attitude. And if you’re the problem, well, you might get some good sex tips.
- Hook up with your screw-buddy. After your bad sexual experience you’re going to have a bad taste in your mouth and just feel like you need to get the event far behind you. If you fall off the horse, of course, the best thing to do is climb right back on. If you’ve got a screw-buddy or an ex-girlfriend you can hook up with just for fun, do so. Getting it on with someone else, and doing so successfully will show you that you’ve still got what it takes and give you some confidence.
- Reflect. The experience might have been very upsetting to you and left you pointing the finger (if not something else) at your partner. But instead of being mad at her and thinking of all the ways to blame her, take some time to reflect on how you might have contributed to the bad experience. Being introspective and self-critical about your bad sexual experience might be difficult, but you might come to a realization that makes you a better lover in the future.