How To Get Rid Of Control Issues In Relationships
Want to know how to get rid of control issues in a relationship? Well, this article will explain a few ways of how to get rid of control issues in a relationships without destroying the relationship in the process. Relationships are a very tricky thing. When you love someone, jealously can become overwhelming along with insecurities you might not be able to conceal so easily. When that happens, a partner may start trying to control certain aspects of the relationship. So many people think that it will help their relationship, when all it truly does is hurt it even more.
- Start by trying to talk about the controlling issue in your relationship with your partner. Whether it's you or the other person, it's best to sit down and try to communicate with each other. Start by addressing the issue of noticing signs of control. Don't be too aggressive, but use insightful sentences such as "I feel" or "I think." Tell your partner about the effects of the controlling behavior. It may make you feel insecure, or may you are insecure and that's why you feel the need to control things.
- Take responsibility for your part. There are always two sides to every story. Depending on which side you fall on, take responsibility for your actions. Maybe you are the controlling one, if so, you should own up to it. If you are on the passive side of things, and are too easy going, own up to it and go from there. Many failed relationships start out by one or the other people never owning up to their mistakes. Own up to your mistakes and take it from there.
- Avoid being the 'victim' on either side. Maybe you are being accused, or maybe you are the accuser, in either aspect of the situation, never let yourself fall as the 'victim'. Avoid guilt trips—giving them or receiving them. A healthy relationship consists of freedom and trust. If you take part in making someone feel guilty or falling victim to being guilty, you aren't helping the controlling issues in your relationship. In fact, you may be making it worse.
- Observe. Listen more than you talk. Whether you have the control issue or your partner does, you need to focus on why there is a control issue. There are always underlying reasons for every problem. If you start to observe why this is taking place, you are in a better place to help fix the problem. Observe your own behavior as to why you might be controlling or listen to your partner's reasons for being controlling.
- Believe in change and help make the change. If you don't believe that either one of you can change, your relationship will simply not work. If you believe that one can change, you have hope of the future. It's best to try to work out issues rather than giving up. If you have tried to believe in change and nothing has worked, it may be time to move on. However, make sure you give the change enough time to work. Relationships take time and patience.