How to Get Rid of Party Crashers

If you're throwing a party, it's a good idea to know how to get rid of party crashers. Simply not letting them into the party may appear to be a good idea, but slamming the door in someone's face is rarely diplomatic. Not only that, most party crashers seem to materialize somewhere around the alcohol or around valuable household items. Don't show your disapproval; this may only make them more determined to crash the party. Be polite. The best ways to get rid of party crashers all rely on subtly discouraging them. When you're getting rid of party crashers, it's only necessary to be direct as a last resort. Try these methods first:

  1. Hide the drinks. A strong percentage of party crashers are looking for a new watering hole. Chuck all the alcohol into a closet and tell them something like, "Hey guys, man, I wish I could offer you a drink or something but we're all out." Remember to be friendly, because they will trust you if you're friendly. It sounds a little devious but, honestly, they were the ones who crashed the party.
  2. Hide the girls. This might sound a little strange, but everyone knows that people crash parties for booze and for female company. You can easily get rid of party crashers if you tell all the females to go upstairs for ten minutes. You could also have the girls leave, then call them when the party crashers are gone.
  3. Party's over! If you tell them that there are no drinks left, you can also inform your would-be party crashers that the party is winding down. Turn down the music and thank everyone for coming, but secretly go around telling your friends that it's just a ruse to get rid of the party crashers. You may want to go as far as handing people their coats and turning on the lights. Remember not to start blasting the music until you've gotten rid of the party crashers and they are well on their way to ruining someone else's good time.
  4. Fake plans. If you or some of your friends are feeling particularly noble, you can always sacrifice yourself by telling the party crashers that you're looking for a better time and then ask if they want to head to another party or a bar. Try this after some of these other strategies don't work. When you get to your destination, you can just circle back to the original party.
  5. Cops! Depending on the location and type of the party, you can always turn off the music and, in a very panicked voice, announce that the cops are here and everyone has to leave. This will usually start the traditional herd rush towards the door and your party crashers will be flushed out the front door.
  6. Kill the party, then reincarnate it. Everyone has cell phones these days. If you feel particularly desperate, you can just tell everyone that the party is actually over and have everyone leave. When you've gotten rid of the party crashers, you can call or text your friends to come back.

You have to remember to be cordial to party crashers, because a lot them feed off of hostility. They aren't concerned with what you think of them, they are just using you for the party itself. In smaller parties you can ask them to leave, but it's generally a safer bet to use the above methods to get rid of party crashers. Now go have a great, party-crasher-free weekend.

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