You do not know how to have an affair with your boss, but you need to know. You do not want to screw this up. You are going to have to stand out from the crowd without being obvious about your intentions. Clinton was a fine President, he just lost track of the game. You can do a better job, because you have seen his mess and you realize where he went wrong. He should have gone with a woman who was at the top of her field, or someone who worked hard for national affairs.
- Do not take calls from your wife while you are working on your affair. You need to keep your eye on the ball, and your thinking straight. Taking calls from your wife will slow your progress. You need that like you need an impeachment hearing.
Ride the elevator with your boss. Get out of your chair when you see your boss is heading to the elevator. Stand next to her in the elevator and tell her that she is underpaid for all that she has to deal with at work. Whisper it to her as you get off the elevator. She will be impressed that you noticed that she is overqualified for her position. Now you have built a bond.
- Ask your boss to lunch. Tell your boss that you are going out for lunch and ask her if she would like to come along. Advise her that if she works through lunch the company is really taking advantage of her, and you hate to see that.
Talk to her at lunch as if she was your friend. Tell her that you wished that she was appreciated more for her efforts. Make sure you tell her that if you owned the company her office would be larger and with a better view. She will stop seeing you as just another suit that she has to baby-sit, but as a source of comfort and someone to have an affair with.
Do not put your hands on her. She will start to feel comfortable with you and she will long for your touch. Your boss will think that you are the person she can count on. Pull away from her now. It creates drama and women love drama. She will start searching you out.
- Ask her if she would like have a drink after work. Call your wife from outside the office and explain that you are working late. Then turn your phone off. You do not want to deal with interruptions when you are about to have a hot affair.
- Enjoy a drink with your boss and relax. She will tell you that she feels drawn to you. Tell her that chemistry is a hard thing to ignore and the power of it is strong. Tell her that you know she can feel it too.
- Ask her if she is ready to have a private affair with you. She will say yes, but you will need to meet up at the hotel separately. You do not want to risk this making national news. She will appreciate that you are keeping things under the radar.
- Get the room at the hotel and then call her on her cell phone. She is circling the hotel in her car and she wants you. Give her the room number and hang up. Make her work a little for your attention.
Open the door. Hold a hand out to her and pull her in. Enjoy your affair.
What Others Are Reading Right Now.
13 Things to Look Forward to in Your 30s
You’ve probably been told that your 20s will be the best years of your life. As someone in their 30s, I can tell you honestly that nothing could be further from the truth. Here are ...
Acting, comedy and strong spirits converge in Speakeasy. When host Paul F. Tompkins interviews entertainers—Key and Peele, Alison Brie, Rob Delaney, Zach Galifianakis—about all sor ...
Remember when Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman made all that noise—and news—before the Super Bowl? We had the story long before the season even started, trailing him all over Se ...