Everyone likes getting kinky, but few like being on display, so here's how to have sex in public without getting caught. If you've never done this, it's important to know that having sex in public is an art. You want to choose places that are out of the way, yet obvious enough that she won't think you're trying to lure her to some secluded place and kill her.
- Go by night. Everyone should know by now that things are obviously harder to see at night. This is great news for you, as it elevates your chances of having sex in public and not getting caught ten-fold! Just be sure to watch out for cops, as many of them see public demonstrations of fertility as somehow "indecent."
- Location, location, location. Pick your public sex location and pick it well, because a bad spot may lead to you getting gawked at, ticketed, or even shot at by especially prude onlookers. Journeying a little ways off hiking trails always makes for excellent public sex territory, as most sheep-like people are conditioned to simply stay on the trail. The trick, obviously enough, is to pick somewhere where people don't generally go and exploit the crap out of it.
- Plan ahead. Yeah sure, having sex in public sounds like a spur of a moment thing, but really it's a well thought out endeavor. Plan your clothing, your positions, your estimated time of completion; do you need lube, condoms or tissues? These are the things you have to think about.
- Make it quick. Here's the real trick to having sex in public and not getting caught: be brief. Don't expect to have an hour long marathon out there, or someone is bound to find you! Make it quick and make sure you're done before anyone even suspects you of doing the deed.
With a little thought and planning, and by keeping these simple suggestions in mind, even you can master the art of having sex in public without getting caught. Once you successfully pull it off, chances are you won't be able to get enough. It may not be the most comfortable, but it is the most rewarding!
What Others Are Reading Right Now.
Acting, comedy and strong spirits converge in Speakeasy. When host Paul F. Tompkins interviews entertainers—Key and Peele, Alison Brie, Rob Delaney, Zach Galifianakis—about all sor …
10 Things Women Expect Men to Know How To Do
To make ladies swoon or at least not cringe, you’d better be able to handle the following…
Emma Watson and Other Child Stars Who Grew Up To Be Hot
Throughout the Harry Potter film series, we've seen Emma Watson transform from a lovable child star into a burgeoning sex symbol. She's not the first actress to do so, and she cert …