Figuring out how to have sex without getting caught kind of takes away the excitement, doesn't it? Well, if excitement isn't your game, then having sex without getting caught isn't very difficult at all. All you need to do is pay attention to your surroundings when you have sex, and you won't get caught. Most people have routines. All you have to do is learn those routines based on where you're trying to have sex and avoid getting caught. Make it into a game. You'll notice that getting away with having sex becomes easier and easier. You may begin to want to risk more. You may find yourself trying to pull of your sexual escapades with less preparation and timing. Well, here's how to have sex without getting caught, for now.
- Know the patterns. If you're really adamant about extinguishing all excitement surrounding having sex in random places, then you're going to need to learn people's patterns. Say for instance, your girlfriend's folks come home at about 4:30 p.m. every day. Well, you know that you should have your lovemaking sessions early enough to where you have time to clean up before her parents come through the door. If you're into getting it on in dressing rooms, you'll need to be crafty enough to sneak around the retail employee on duty.
- Learn to be quiet. If you guys are naturally loud together, you may need to put a muzzle on it. If she needs to dig her fingers into your back to keep from screaming, then you'd better let her grab a hold. Having sex without getting caught is about not drawing any extra attention to yourself. People have gotten down in a full baseball stadium. How did they do it? They handled their business without drawing added attention. You draw extra looks when you're too damn loud. So, don't be loud.
- And… Along with being quiet, you guys need to learn how to do the deed in plain view. Having sex without getting caught means developing a ninja-like plan to get down without people around you being any wiser. Take the movie theatre, for instance. People have sex in places like this all the time. How? Because they use their surroundings to their advantage. Everybody else is going to be looking at Batman. They're not even going to be thinking about your girl bouncing in your lap while the Caped Crusader slaps the Joker around. Find a discreet section of the movie theatre and get it cracking.
- Dress for the occasion. You go commando. She should wear a dress and no panties. The only difficulty you'd have in this scenario is getting the condom on without drawing attention to yourselves. You could even slap it on in the bathroom before you guys decide to get it on. It's all about creativity and making the access as easy as possible.
- Don't let fear interfere. If you worry too much about having sex and getting caught, you may knock yourself right out of the mood. So, when you've made up your mind, and you have a decent plan, follow it through. Just do it. Don't worry about the consequences. You need to be worrying about that fine woman you got with you who is ready to get down.
What Others Are Reading Right Now.
Acting, comedy and strong spirits converge in Speakeasy. When host Paul F. Tompkins interviews entertainers—Key and Peele, Alison Brie, Rob Delaney, Zach Galifianakis—about all sor …
Made Man Food Shows
We all love great food—and the people who make it! Our culinary video series introduces you to the country's best chefs and experts, so you can become one yourself. Pull up a chair …
21 Fantastic Facts About Ronda Rousey
This trivia’s like her fights: quick and jarring.