How To Have Sex At Work

So you want to know how have sex at work. If thats what you want, then do it, but do it carefully or you'll end up on some web page or worse yet, you'll end up jobless if you get caught. Seriously though, having sex at work is one of the most sexually exhilarating experiences you'll ever have. Now man up and get some of that office booty.

  1. This task isn't for the faint of heart. An office romp can be professionally hazardous, but you want that office sex don't you? You're going to need a partner as daring as you. She's got to have ice in her veins, She's got to be ready to do whatever, whenever, and however and not necessarily in that order. You may only have five or ten minutes to get it on so she's got to be ready to go!
  2. Keep your eyes open to the opportunities. Don't underestimate the usefulness of an empty office or an oversized filing closet. Back when I worked for a major Healthcare company, I got it on in the company lunch room at lunch time. Talk about some awesome work sex. It only lasted for seven minutes and 33 seconds but it was fantastic. Sex at work is supposed to be fresh and new and inventive and freaky and… You get the idea.
  3. After hours sex may not be the safest sex. Offices usually have contracted cleaning people that come in after work hours to tidy up. If you don't trust the janitor to safe guard your secret sexual escapade, it might be helpful to know their rotation schedule. Unless of course they're the ones you happen to rotating with.
  4. Plan for repeat sessions. If you're anything like me, having sex at work can start to become an addiction. And like all addictions, it needs to be constantly fed. It got to the point to where my partner and I met at least three times a week in the office. We marked every area possible in that place. If, for some reason we couldn't get together in the building, we did the do in one of our cars. It still counts if it's on company property right?
  5. Don't get too comfortable. Once you've figured out the trick to having sex at work, you'll want to get more and more risky. Just watch yourself, you still work there. After a while, the allure of "dangerous" sex will eventually fade causing you to want to gamble with higher stakes in increasingly more dangerous places and times. Remember sex at work is not worth your job. As intoxicating as this risky business can be, office booty doesn't pay the bills.
  6. Finally, remember all freaky things eventually come to and end… Or is that all good things? Whatever. This set up just wont last forever. Nothing ever does. Don't be sad about it. Don't fret about not having sex at work anymore. You can work on having sex in so many other places. The possibilities are endless if you're brave enough.    
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