How Long Should You Date Before You Get Engaged?

How long should you date before you get engaged to the person you’ve dreamed about? This is a milestone in any relationship; one you don’t want to take lightly. What a dilemma, "Should I or shouldn’t I?". On the one hand if you get engaged too soon, you may realize you jumped the gun by moving too fast and call the engagement off, but decide to continue dating . That might cause a negative reaction unless the decision was mutual between both parties. On the other hand, if you wait too long, the person you are dating may feel you are not serious about the relationship and may decide to move on. Before getting engaged, assess your relationship by answering for yourself the following questions, which will help you decide whether to wait or whether to go for it!

  1. Do you have a lot in common with the person you are thinking about getting engaged too? Even though its true opposites attract, you still want to have some type of compatibility with your potential mate or you might be in for a rocky start. Be honest in your evaluation and really ask yourself if you could see yourself spending the majority of your free time with this person for the rest of your life before getting engaged.

  2.  Have you shared secrets and deep thoughts with the person? You have to want to share things with this person that you wouldn't want to share with anyone else before you think about getting engaged to them. Being married is the most intimate relationship you will have.  Before getting engaged, make sure you trust your partner and that you feel comfortable around them.  Your partner should be someone you can count on and you should be sure of that before getting engaged.

  3. Have you met each other’s families yet? Although the tradition of a man asking a woman’s father for her hand in marriage is an old tradition that has pretty much died out, meeting each other’s family is an important step in building a good relationship with your partner. If your partner insists that you meet her family or you can't wait for her to meet yours (and vice versa), this is a clue that the two of you may be ready to move on from dating to something more permanent, like deciding to get in engaged.

  4. What phase of the relationship are you in? At the beginning of dating someone new, you will bend over backwards to keep that person's attention. The relationship is exciting and new, but you may not be completely relaxed. You are trying hard to impress this person so you may not be ready to let that person see the real you. You may not have let your hair down, totally, so to speak.  It is important to take a step back and gauge where your relationship is.  If your partner has not seen most of your sides, it is probably not the best idea to get engaged yet.

  5. The first argument! If someone says they never argue or have disagreements with their significant other, don’t believe them—how boring would that be. An argument can be fun and exciting especially when you get to make-up later. Even if you agree to disagree that’s better than keeping things bottled up inside for fear of messing-up your prefect relationship. This doesn’t exist and a disagreement here and there is healthy for the relationship. Arguing will give you valuable insight about your partner and about the relationship.  Avoiding arguments is a good way to never truly see what you are getting yourself in to before deciding to get engaged..

You will know in your heart when you are ready to become in engaged; don’t put a time stamp on it. Whether you have been dating for one month or one year, you will know when you are ready to commit to that person.

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