How To Make A Beer Hat

At every Super Bowl or tailgate party, “that guy” is there partying it up with a beer hat on his head. Have you ever wondered how to make a beer hat for yourself? They are really cool conversation starters, and it's actually easier than you might think!

Here is all you need to get your own party started:

  • Two standard sized water bottles
  • Knife (we suggest leaving this item at home)
  • Two Bull clips
  • Two pieces of tubing (“straws”)
  • Liquid nail glue or stapler (needle and thread if you have skills)
  • Pair of socks (tube socks work best)
  • Favorite baseball cap (must still have the old team spirit ghost attached)
  1. Prepare yourself for the glorious mission. The making of your beer hat venture is not to be taken lightly; we recommend saying a prayer to the "Great Beer Hat Deity in the Sky." We also suggest doing this project whilst sober, at least until you get proficient at it.
  2. Make your beer cups. Grab your socks. At the open holes, tie them both together. Go ahead and double knot them. This is crucial, as you do not want any mishaps. Terrible things could happen, should they come loose. Use your imagination for this one, but for now, just trust us.
  3. Attach the socks. Staple, glue or sew the socks directly onto the ball cap, making sure the knot is on the top, not to the brim of the cap. Take special care not to glue the sock’s top layer to your beer hat. These are your beer cups, or pockets, if you will. See why they need to be well-balanced and secure? Loose socks, plus rowdiness, equals a drowned party-participant.
  4. Dry your beer cap. This only applies if you have used glue to attach the socks to your beer hat.
  5. Attach the tubing. Take your knife and make a hole in the top of the water bottle caps. They should be smaller than the circumference of the tube. Next, feed your tube through the hole of the bottle caps. Go all the way down to the bottom of the bottle, and do the same for the other water bottle.
  6. Put your water bottles into the socks. You may have to cut a small slit near the top of the socks in case the water bottles fit too tight inside the sock. Use your best judgment on this one.
  7. Take it for a trial run. Fill your water bottles with your favorite brew, put the water bottle caps back on and go brag to your best buds that you know how to make a beer hat. Later, you will want to siphon the beer by using the clips, as well as to keep your straws from getting in your way.

In the immortal words of Stephen Wright: "There are 24 hours in a day… 24 beers in a case… coincidence?" This world needs more beer lovers!

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