Life can monotonous and boring, so why not keep your sex life in juxtaposition to the mundane— in this article, you will learn how to make a sex swing stand, and in turn, spice up your sexy time.
- One 2×4 Kiln Dried Stud
- Drywall screws
- Eye hook with 300 pound rating
- Chain (No, not NECESSARILY for what you think, given the content of the title of this article)
- Locate the joists of an attic area, assuming you have an attic area, and that you may not always want your sex swing on a museum-like display. It is always good to have the option of temporarily removing such an item as a sex swing at your discretion, unless it is the object of your open house display for potential buyers.
- Add a 2×4 across the joists, once the joists are located in an attic area. A Kiln Dried Stud will suffice for this purpose.
- Identify an area where you have a light fixture. Make sure that you turn off the breaker and remove the light fixture temporarily, as to see what wires are present.
- Pull back the insulation and attach the 2×4 with screws. This is also an optimal time to evaluate the condition of your insulation. Is it moldy? Does its current R-value comply with current building codes?
- Buy an eye hook with a 300 pound rating. This is the minimum amount of weight you should use, as the sex swing is not just for marveled and overwhelmed onlookers.
- Invest in a spring! Given the likelihood of the presence of intense bouncing, one must invest in a spring to support this bouncing! This will subsidize some of the tension generated from the eye hook.
- Attach a drilled a hole through the drywall exactly where you want to the sex swing to hang (between the light bulbs of the fixture). Be careful to utilize a drywall screw that will correspond to 5/8 sheetrock.
- Drill another hole through the plastic casing of the light fixture that aligns with the hole in the sheetrock. This is where your completed, built sex swing shall reside.
- Purchase the proper length of chain so that it is barely exposed. Now, you just unscrew the glass and attach a chain of whatever length you want and put the sex swing on the end of it.
- Test out your swing! Assuming your partner is a WILLING participant. It would be rather boring putting it through a trial run by yourself!
- Make sure your partner is securely fastened during the use of the swing, but not too tight to prevent circulation
- Start slowly the first time you use the sex swing, in order to make sure it is safely proportionate to the individual on the swing.
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