How To Meet Justin Bieber
If you're currently suffering from the "Bieber Fever," you're going to need some tips to learn how to meet Justin Bieber. Be warned—you're fighting against millions pof teenaged girls and middle-aged women who go absolutely bananas for this plucky Canuck, and you're going to need to be prepared. Realize that learning how to meet Justin Bieber is not just a task: it is a sacred right that only the strong should even dare to attempt. Following are just a few tips that will help you finally realize your goal of meeting Justin Bieber and becoming the envy of, literally, everyone who you know and will ever meet.
If you're serious about learning how to meet Justin Bieber, equip yourself with the following:
- A computer with a dedicated Internet connection
- Several social networking website accounts (Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, etc.)
- A nearly-limitless amount of cash
- Enough free time to dedicate several sleepness nights per month
- A momentous supply of arts and crafts supplies
- Several design textbooks
- Limitless tenacity
- Endless supply of nerve
- Constant vigilance
- Do Your Research. In order to meet Justin Bieber, you're going to need to think like a big-game hunter. You need to learn how to stalk your prey, navigate his natural habitat, and most importantly, anticipate his every moves. Make a Facebook, Twitter, and MySpace account for the sole purpose of receiving any and all Bieber-related updates. If you have a smartphone, make certain that it's wired to receive these updates at a moment's notice. The Bieber moves like a cheetah, and you need to make certain that you are always kept abreast of any and all updates as to his whereabouts. You're never going to meet Justin Bieber if you don't know his exact touring schedule, appearance schedule, or interview locations.
- Do Your Preperation. This is where your arts and crafts supplies come in. You need your sign to shout, nay, sing your love for The Biebs. If you're truly dedicated to meeting Justin Bieber, you should spare no expense in making your sign the loudest in the entire crowd. Mutiple color layers? Of course. Electric green outlines over everything? Yes yes yes. Glitter and sparkles? Why are you even asking? The key to getting the attention of, and thus meeting Justin Bieber, is making sure that your sign is the prettiest girl in the entire ball. Read those textbooks we suggested earlier to ensure that your design is pitch-perfect, because you know that anything less will just not do.
- Attend The Events. Make Your Presence Known. This is where things get tricky. If he's doing a public appearance, you want to be there at least 24 hours in advance to ensure that you're at the front of the pack. A concert? A week would be amazing, but realistically, you can show up at the venue about 48 hours prior to the opening of the doors. If you have the opportunity to win VIP tickets to any of his shows, spare no expense in enlisting everyone you know to help you win any contests and/or physical challenges that would result in gaining those coveted passes. Once the event starts, wave your sign like it's our nation's banner and make certain that you maintain constant eye contact with Justin Bieber. This is important—do not yield. Not even for a second. Physical exhaustion and flashing strobes are no excuse for missing your opportunity for meeting Justin Bieber. Once he knows that you are there, it's only a matter of time before you get pulled on stage or he acknowledges you in his interview. If not, fear not soldier. Scrap your poster, go back to your workshop, and keep on going until the next opporunity arises.