Figuring out how not to get an erection is all about mind over matter. There’s not a guy in the world that hasn’t been embarrassed by an inopportune erection. Remember that time when Sister Goody Two Shoes asked you to do that math problem on the board? You were to busy day dreaming about that hot chick in front of you. The problem was, you’re little soldier decided to report for duty at the very moment you were being deployed to the chalk board. Learning to control your erections can be a very useful tool in minimizing certain embarrassing situations. So, how do you keep from getting an erection? It’s all in the mind buddy. Here’s how not to get an erection.
- Understanding men. You’re guys. Thinking about sex is inevitable. Hell, thinking about sex all the time is inevitable. You just can’t help it. Now that you realize you can’t help it, all you can do is cope with it. You need to develop a system that’ll either keep your erection from reaching its full potential, or will knock the erection out quickly.
- The escape. There’s not a guy alive that isn’t bothered by something. If you feel an erection popping up, immediately focus on that stressful situation that has you vexed. Your erection won’t stand a chance. But now you may have to deal with a small bout of depression. It’s your call.
- Be proactive. If you feel your mind starting to wander because you caught a glimpse of some very nice cleavage, you need to act quickly. You need to immediately think of something that’ll make you forget about the nicely displayed boobs in front of you. This “something” you need to think of is different for each guy. Maybe thoughts of work will kill your sexual buzz. Maybe it’s a nasty scene in a movie. You need to find anything you can fixate on that’ll balance out those thoughts of boobs and booty. Each and every one of you have to come up with that fail safe thought.
- Emergency action. If you feel your erection coming on and you can’t focus on that anti-erection thought, you need act quickly. You need to lock your vision on something quickly. You know how beautiful those boobs are? Well you need to focus on something, anything that’s as ugly as those boobs are beautiful to you. Try focusing on the fat guy snoring two seats down.
- Physical steps. Pinching yourself very hard when an erection is taking place can knock it out very quickly. A shot of pain is probably the quickest way to kill an erection. But, is turning your arm black and blue really worth it? Probably not.
What Others Are Reading Right Now.
13 Things to Look Forward to in Your 30s
You’ve probably been told that your 20s will be the best years of your life. As someone in their 30s, I can tell you honestly that nothing could be further from the truth. Here are ...
Acting, comedy and strong spirits converge in Speakeasy. When host Paul F. Tompkins interviews entertainers—Key and Peele, Alison Brie, Rob Delaney, Zach Galifianakis—about all sor ...
Remember when Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman made all that noise—and news—before the Super Bowl? We had the story long before the season even started, trailing him all over Se ...