How to Party at The Playboy Mansion

Get ready for the most important thing you'll ever learn, how to party at the Playboy Mansion. Kicking it at the Playboy Mansion is every mans dream, Every man's. Hugh Hefner has the adoration and simultaneous envy of every red blooded male in the country. He's got at least seven hot girls around him at all times. All we want is a piece of the action. Don't you want the chance to pull an Axel Foley? Don't you want the chance to jump the gates and party at The Playboy Mansion? Well, this is how you do it. This is how you crash party central. This is how you party at The Playboy Mansion.

  1. The hard part. Getting in. You can't party at the Playboy Mansion if you can't get in. Unless you're famous or some other type of distinguished guest you won't just be able to walk through the front door. So, how to we get in? Playing for a winning University of Illinois sports club can get you a visit to the Playboy Mansion. For those of you looking for a college, here's some incentive to enroll. Former playmates can always get into a Hef bash. So, our best chance of entry is to try to befriend a past playmate. Or, start playing poker professionally. Hef has a celebrity poker tournament there every year. What ever the means, the ends will be justified.
  2. Soak it all in. The Playboy Mansion is full of stories, oozing with myth and legend. It's up to you to create your own. But first, you have to see everything and every chick there is to see. If there is a heaven then God has to be a man. The beauties inside the mansion walls are the divine proof. The house itself has at least 30 rooms. You're guaranteed to see some wild stuff in there. You may not be able to bring a camera, but the stuff you'll witness will be forever imprinted on your brain. Make sure you see as much as possible.
  3. The alcohol. Do we have to mention it? This is Hef's pad. You know the alcohol is going to be top shelf straight off the chain. Might as well indulge. Hell, get plastered like newly laid drywall. You only live once and visiting the Playboy Mansion is a once in a lifetime event.
  4. Celebrities. Celebrities pop up in the Playboy Mansion like weeds in a freshly cut lawn. Make sure you get some elbow rubbing done. Try to build bridges. Who knows, you may find yourself a return ticket to the Playboy Mansion via some movie star or socialite. Get out there and meet people.
  5. The girls. It's imperative that you meet some of the women. Tell them you need guides to show you around the grounds, Or say you're Ben Affleck's distant third cousin twice removed from his father's side. Do whatever it takes to get one of those, or even two of those blonde beauties on your arms. Live the dream dude. This'll probably be your only time here so you have to do it Hef style. Or as close as you can get to Hefner status.
  6. Grotto. You've got the girls. You've got something to gulp on. You need to get them to the Grotto. This is probably the most erotically infamous spot on the planet. It's known for going down here. If you don't get in the Grotto there's no reason to show up at the Playboy Mansion. Hell,the mansion wouldn't be as famous as it is if it wasn't for the legendary sexual escapades that took place in the Grotto. It's time to leave your mark. Get your ass in the Grotto. After all is said and done. beg Hef to let you move in.
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