How To Pass A Urine Drug Test

You're scheduled for the dreaded test and now you need to know how to pass a urine drug test. The easiest way to pass is not to partake in anything that will label you as un-hirable, get you terminated or fail your probation requirements. But, you had a little too much fun and need to remedy the situation, fast. Lucky for you, there are several products on the market that are easily accessible for every budget.

  1. Drive yourself to the nearest smoking accessories store. Study the selection. They will probably have several "fake pee" kits available for purchase. 
  2. Choose wisely. While most urine tests are done in private, some administrators invade the private peeing-process to make sure you are actually peeing. The choice is much easier when you know if you will be watched or not. Some kits even come with a tube you can hold against your penis for a more realistic peeing experience.
  3. Buy yourself some tighty-whiteys. If the kit you choose does not have a strap or other concealment method, these tighty-whiteys will come in handy to hold your fake pee up, and not let the bottle slip through your pant leg to the floor in front of the administrator. They will also help keep your pee warm by tucking it to your body.
  4. Mix the kit, microwave it, whatever it says to do, they are pretty straight-forward. The bottle should have an external thermometer so you can get the right temperature. Your pee can't be too hot or too cold, they will know.
  5. Put on those tighty-whiteys, secure your fake pee and head to the test site. Be confident, and walk naturally!
  6. Take your test. If you're not being watched–hopefully–check the temperature of your fake pee, making sure it's where it needs to be. Fill the cup and hand it off to the administrator. Even if you are not being watched, the administrator may be right outside the door, so make sure your bottle doesn't make any noise and you don't have things like rubber bands holding it shut.
  7. Relax. The test is over, the pee is clean, and you are good to go.

There are many other options, with dilution being the other most common and highly effective method. All methods of passing a drug test are risky, however, if you are already going to test positive, it is a chance that must be taken.


Doc Potter: Passing the Urine Test

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